27/07/2026
Whoever decided (rhetorical… it was Gary Chapman) that words of affirmation were enough!!!
Pfft!
Words are worth absolutely nothing on their own. They need to be paired with intentional action to mean anything.
When I was wounded and needy, the words were what I craved. To be told I was valued, pretty, proud of, enough. Oh my heart bled for those words. And when I heard them my insecure attachment jumped straight to connection and commitment.
And then I learned.
These words came from those who also had attachment wounds and could never show up for me, not really show up.
They offered the words I asked for so that they could get their wound tended in return.
It was basically a two person emotional s**t show.
Love is a verb.
It’s something we need to DO, to demonstrate, with intentional action. Or the person we feel that love for doesn’t feel it.
These days I show up with intentional acts of love for myself.
I value myself in legitimate ways that matter to me.
I don’t tell those around how to treat me. I demonstrate it!
I affirm my loved ones with intentional action too.
The love languages need a thorough update.