06/18/2026
So let’s talk about doormat energy for a second.
There’s a version of you that has been holding it all together for so long — at home, at work, in relationships, in rooms where you were the only one holding the line — she started mistaking her unlimited support and holding on for “hope,” for who she actually is.
Not because you’re “too nice” — but because somewhere along the way, most of us (women) learned that being agreeable, complacent, forgiving, accommodating, and endlessly flexible was the price of being loved, hired and feeling chosen.
So we got good at it. Really good. Gold-medal good.🏅
And then she’s left exhausted, energetically drained or financially strained from performing palatability and over-empathy in spaces — boardrooms, relationships, group chats — that don’t reciprocate and were never safe enough for her to show up fully.
Because here’s what nobody tells you: the same energy that keeps you agreeable in an imbalanced relationship dynamic, is the same energy that keeps you silent in a meeting where your idea just got credited to someone else.
The same wound that has you over-explaining your “no” to a partner is the one that has you over-delivering at work just to feel like you’ve earned your seat.
It’s the same pattern. Different costume. And sometimes it takes hard lessons, heartbreak and hindsight to see it.
Full-self energy isn’t a rebrand. It isn’t a glow-up. It’s the quiet, sometimes uncomfortable process of finding your way back to the version of yourself you agreed to shrink — and deciding she’s the one worth nourishing, loving and protecting.
These are the 8 things I (& my abandonment wound) had to unlearn to get there. Some took years. Some I’m still working on.
All of them changed something, and your nervous system and inner child are clocking it.
Swipe through — which one lands for you? Drop it below. No judgment. I’ve been there. 👇🏽
