Fiona Parr Focusing

Fiona Parr Focusing Information, inspiration and notifications about Focusing and the Dartmoor Focusing Centre, active in Devon, UK.

Thinking at the Edge in the New Year - First steps (Online)January 20th, 27th, February 3rd & 10thIn this short course, ...
05/12/2023

Thinking at the Edge in the New Year - First steps (Online)
January 20th, 27th, February 3rd & 10th
In this short course, we will explore the first 6 or 7 steps of the process. The purpose of the first stage of TAE (Steps 1 - 5) is to facilitate speaking from the felt sense. Then you find examples of when what you are tracking actually happened. This anchors your knowing into real life, based on your experience.
An adventure in thinking, Focusing, self-exploration and questioning.

In this short online course, we will explore the first 6 or 7 steps of the TAE process. An adventure in thinking. Challenging, demanding and very enjoyable... January 20th, 27th, February 3rd, 10th (Saturday mornings 10am - 1pm )

How can you help yourself to stay awake and not get too relaxed?I suggest that you continue to articulate what you are e...
21/04/2023

How can you help yourself to stay awake and not get too relaxed?
I suggest that you continue to articulate what you are experiencing.
You can say what is happening in your current life situation; any thoughts and feelings that are connected with it, and any body sensations that you are aware of.
The more you say, the more there is to notice and to pay attention to.
It’s important to pause periodically and to notice what more is coming into your awareness.

A Focuser says they nearly fell asleep in their session. What causes that and what can you do about it when that happens?

Focusing is counter-cultural, in that it values what is unclear and not yet known.In our culture, we are used to having ...
27/02/2023

Focusing is counter-cultural, in that it values what is unclear and not yet known.
In our culture, we are used to having to come up with immediate answers to questions. It’s not usual to say, ‘I don’t know.’ The questioner may want more of an explanation.
I remember this as a child. My mother would become impatient and say, ‘Come on; you must know. Just say it.’
Sometimes we don’t have the words yet, just a vague, inarticulate sense. The words need time to emerge.
I have seen this happen often in meetings. Perhaps someone in the group has been silent during the whole meeting, and then quietly ventures a small contribution. All eyes turn to that person, wanting more.
Perhaps the person feels like the spotlight is on them, and words fail them. They cannot yet articulate what they want to say. If they feel pressure, that may clam up and say no more.
If they sense the group is willing to wait, they can settle, and let the words come slowly and naturally from their felt sense...

I recently took part in a conversation with European colleagues where we explored why Focusing is not widely known yet.

At first, when you are new to Focusing, it can feel like an act of faith; being told that there is something there in yo...
27/02/2023

At first, when you are new to Focusing, it can feel like an act of faith; being told that there is something there in your body, that contains living wisdom that you can’t feel yet.
It comes, if you are patient and wait. Gradually, through many Focusing sessions, you discover there is indeed an inner reference point, an inner compass, that you can trust and rely upon...

Focusing and felt-sensing is subtle and complex. There may be multiple felt-senses. If you focus in on one, you may be missing out on others and getting an incomplete picture.

I want to validate and affirm that it’s perfectly fine to be in your head. What makes a difference is your relationship ...
27/02/2023

I want to validate and affirm that it’s perfectly fine to be in your head.
What makes a difference is your relationship with what is coming in your head and your thoughts.
Are you being open and curious, or are you criticising and judging what comes?

How to handle it when we get stuck in our head and thinking, when practising Focusing?

What can you do when things don’t feel resolved at the end of a session?You can say to yourself, I will come back to thi...
18/04/2022

What can you do when things don’t feel resolved at the end of a session?
You can say to yourself, I will come back to this next time. Then it’s helpful to ‘mark’ where you have got to, to help you to return to it another time.
‘Marking the place’ where you have got to means to revisit what happened in the session.
Remember how it felt at the beginning, and notice any changes that have happened during the session.

Perhaps you have a decision to make, or you want to resolve an life issue or problem. After Focusing on it with a Focusing partner, you may still end up with an uncomfortable feeling, that things are not sorted out as you hoped.

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭’𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭? 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭’𝐬 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫...
17/01/2022

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭’𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭? 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭’𝐬 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝.
If you are a Person-centered counsellor, you know that one of the main ways you can support your client is to help them to be in touch with their feelings, and for you to reflect the feelings accurately. In that way, the client feels heard and accepted. If you can reflect with empathy, the client feels accompanied, and recognises they are not alone with their feelings.

How to help your client’s process to carry forward.

Like tears, I feel that anger needs to have its expression, and only later can we begin to settle down with it, from a p...
15/03/2021

Like tears, I feel that anger needs to have its expression, and only later can we begin to settle down with it, from a place of compassion and friendliness.
Then you can empathise with the feeling, and you can say to it no wonder it feels that way, given the situation.

Like many of us, when I am being with my anger, I find it very hard to get any kind of distance.

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