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Held SEN Support Space, Locks Heath, Fareham (2026)

03/06/2026

DO YOU SEE ME?

Today I met another mum who is tired.

Not tired because she stayed up too late.
Not tired because she had a busy week.

Tired because she is carrying the weight of appointments, forms, emails, meetings, phone calls, worries, sleepless nights, and the constant fight to get her child the support they need.

Tired because every answer seems to create another question.

Tired because she is trying to be a mum, an advocate, a nurse, a teacher, a therapist and a researcher all at the same time.

The truth is, behind every child struggling in school, every tribunal, every EHCP meeting, every attendance concern, every referral and every battle for support…

There is usually a parent quietly carrying more than most people will ever see.

So today, if that’s you, I want you to know:

I see you.

I see the emails you write at midnight.
I see the tears you hide.
I see the appointments you never wanted to become an expert in.
I see how fiercely you love your child.

And even on the days when you feel you’re getting nowhere…

You are making a difference.

💜 From one SEN mum, nan and SENCO to another…

I see you.
I hear you.
I’m here for you.

02/06/2026

💜 DO YOU SEE ME? 💜

Today I spent several hours supporting a mum whose child has significant additional needs.

After a long Tribunal process, it was agreed that the child requires a specialist educational placement.

The world sees a Tribunal decision and assumes the battle is over.

But they don’t see what comes next.

They don’t see the schools that have already said “no”.

They don’t see the uncertainty.

They don’t see the endless emails, phone calls and waiting.

They don’t see a mum trying to fight for her child whilst managing her own health challenges.

They don’t see the hospital appointments.

They don’t see the exhaustion.

They don’t see the young baby who also needs her love, care and attention.

Today wasn’t about celebrating a Tribunal outcome.

Today was about helping a mum work out what happens next.

Creating a plan.

Writing emails.

Finding the next step when the path ahead feels impossible.

I saw a parent who was tired, overwhelmed and worried.

But I also saw a parent who refuses to give up on her child.

And that is what people often don’t see.

Behind every report, meeting, appeal and email is a family carrying far more than most people realise.

💜 Shared anonymously through HELD.

I see you, Mummy.
I’m here for you. 💜

02/06/2026

💜 DO YOU SEE ME? 💜

Behind every SEND family is a story.

A story of love.
A story of resilience.
A story of worries, celebrations, challenges and triumphs.

Sometimes the world only sees a moment.

They don’t see the sleepless nights.
They don’t see the appointments.
They don’t see the endless advocating.
They don’t see the courage it takes just to get through the day.

So I’d like to create a regular feature on HELD called “Do You See Me?”

Parents and carers can privately message me their experiences, thoughts or feelings, and with permission I will share them anonymously.

Because your story matters.

Because someone else may read it and realise they are not alone.

Because together we are stronger.

If you’d like to take part, send me a message beginning with:

💜 Do You See Me?

No names. No judgement. Just real stories from real families.

Love,
Cathy x

02/06/2026

Hello everyone 👋💜

It’s been a little while since I’ve posted on HELD, so I thought I’d reintroduce myself.

I’m Cathy, a Preschool Manager and SENCO with over 26 years of experience supporting children and families. I’m also a mum to four daughters, two of whom are autistic, and a very proud nanny to ten grandchildren, six of whom are autistic.

SEND isn’t just my job – it’s my family’s reality too.

I know the struggles, the sleepless nights, the meetings, the forms, the worries and the battles that sometimes come with trying to get the right support for our children. But I also know the incredible joys, achievements, laughter, unique perspectives and moments of pride that make this journey so special.

Recently I’ve been busy supporting families with school placements and advocating for children to receive the support they need. On a personal level, my grandson Mikey continues to face challenges with school attendance due to a sleep disorder, reminding me that the SEND journey is never straightforward, even when you’ve worked in the field for many years.

Today I organised and hosted a Parent Hub at the preschool alongside the Neurodiversity Team. It was wonderful to see parents come together to share their experiences, concerns and hopes for their children. The conversations were honest, supportive and a reminder of how much strength there is within our SEND community.

That is why HELD exists.

This page is a safe space to share our SEND journeys, ask questions, seek support, celebrate successes and remind one another that we are doing our best.

Whether you’re waiting for an assessment, navigating school challenges, supporting a teenager, or simply trying to get through another day, you are welcome here.

I’d love to hear from you. Tell me a little about your family and where you are on your SEND journey. 💜

No question is silly. No parent walks alone.

Love,
Cathy x

18/05/2026

Sometimes SEND practitioners, SENCOs, teachers, TAs, and early years staff are carrying far more than people realise.

We love our children fiercely.And sometimes that love is quietly used against us.

Because we care, we stay late.Because we care, we fight for support.Because we care, we absorb the worry, the pressure, the meetings, the paperwork, the emotional weight, and the constant fear of letting a child or family down.

Many SEND professionals are trying to support increasingly complex needs within systems that are underfunded, overstretched, and struggling to cope.

And yet the expectation remains:“Keep going… because the children need you.”

Of course they do.But the adults supporting them need support too.

Compassion should never replace proper funding.Passion should never replace realistic staffing, training, or specialist services.And caring deeply should never mean sacrificing your own wellbeing.

Behind so many calm, smiling professionals are exhausted people desperately trying to hold children, families, and systems together.

To every SEND practitioner and educator feeling weary right now:

You are not failing.The system is failing to hold you properly.

And still… what you do matters more than words can say. 🤍

25/04/2026

Sometimes the smallest patch of sunshine is all you need 🤍
Doug showing us how to pause, sit, and just be

23/04/2026

🌿 HELD – SEN Support Space 🌿

“School avoidance is just a new trend…”

I sat in a meeting recently and heard those words.

And if I’m honest… it hurt.

Not because I don’t understand where schools are coming from — I do.
I’ve worked in education for over 26 years.

But because behind every child who can’t attend school,
there is a story.

A real one.

Not a trend.
Not a phase.
Not poor parenting.

A nervous system in overwhelm.
A child who feels unsafe, even when they can’t explain why.
A family trying everything… and still being told it’s not enough.

⸻

Let’s gently say this, together:

School avoidance is not new.
What’s new… is that children are showing us more clearly when something isn’t working for them.

And that takes courage.

⸻

For some children, walking through the school gate is easy.
For others, it feels like standing at the edge of something their body simply cannot manage.

That’s not defiance.
That’s distress.

⸻

As parents, you sit in those meetings
holding it all together
while quietly carrying the weight of:

• sleepless nights
• heightened anxiety
• trying every strategy you’ve been given
• and still feeling like you’re being questioned

I see you.

⸻

And to the professionals reading this — because I know many of you do —
this isn’t about blame.

It’s about understanding.

When we shift from
“Why won’t they come in?”
to
“What’s making it hard for them to be here?”

Everything changes.

⸻

No parent chooses this path.
No child wants to feel this way.

This isn’t a trend.

This is children asking — in the only way they can —
to be understood.

⸻

🌿 No question is silly. No parent walks alone. 🌿

⸻

If this is your journey right now…
you are not failing.

You are responding to your child in the way they need most.

And that matters more than anything.

23/04/2026

There’s a moment many SEND parents experience.

The moment you meet another parent who just gets it.

Suddenly you don’t have to explain the acronyms.
You don’t have to justify your worries.

You’re simply understood.

SEND parenting can feel incredibly isolating, but connecting with others on a similar path can make such a difference.

Advice is shared.
Experiences are validated.
And the weight many parents carry alone becomes a little lighter.

That’s why we created Cuppa & Chat nearly nine years ago.

Friendly, informal sessions where SEND parents can connect online or in person.

They’re always free.

You can join us here:
https://www.eventbrite.com/cc/cuppachat-sessions-3847953

19/04/2026

HELD – SEN Support Space

“For the parents the system keeps overlooking… but who never stop showing up.”

This one is for the parents out there…

The ones making the calls.
Chasing the referrals.
Repeating their child’s story over and over again.

The ones being passed from one service to another…
told “it’s not us”…
told “you’re not in the right area”…
told “there’s nothing more we can do.”

And still… they keep going.

💛

This is for the parents
battling a system that too often tries to ignore them.

Not because they’re difficult.
Not because they’re asking for too much.

But because they are asking for what their child is entitled to.

Support.
Assessment.
Understanding.
Care.

⸻

🌿 Let’s say it clearly:

These parents are not a problem.

They are advocates.
They are protectors.
They are the voice their child doesn’t yet have.

They are warriors—even on the days they feel completely worn down.

⸻

🌿 Behind every “pushy parent” label…

Is usually a Mum or Dad who:

Hasn’t slept properly in weeks.
Is holding multiple children with different needs.
Is navigating systems that don’t join up.
Is carrying worry, exhaustion, and responsibility all at once.

And still…
they show up.

⸻

🌿 If this is you:

We see you.

We see the strength it takes
to keep going when you’re being ignored.

We see the courage it takes
to question professionals and ask again.

We see the love behind every email, every phone call, every “I’m not giving up.”

⸻

🌿 A quiet truth:

If the system worked properly…
you wouldn’t have to fight this hard.

⸻

🌿 So keep going (even gently):

Your voice matters.
Your child matters.
And what you’re asking for is valid.

Even when it feels like no one is listening.

⸻

You are not “too much.”
You are doing exactly what your child needs.

And in this space…
you are HELD 🤍

⸻

“We see your progress — even when it’s small, because every step matters.”
Supporting every child, every step of the way 🌿

19/04/2026

And in the middle of this is a Mum…

A single Mum.
With a 13-year-old navigating a sleep disorder.
A 4-year-old showing ADHD traits.
And a 3-month-old baby in her arms.

Trying to juggle appointments that don’t exist.
Phone calls that go nowhere.
Nights with little to no sleep.
Days where everything still has to carry on.

Trying to cope.

🤍

Sleep disorders are not “just a phase.”
They impact learning, behaviour, emotional wellbeing… everything.

And most importantly…

We see you.

The broken nights.
The heavy days.
The strength it takes to keep advocating when you’re running on empty.

You are holding more than most people will ever realise.

Held SEN Support Space

03/06/2026

02/06/2026

02/06/2026

02/06/2026

18/05/2026

25/04/2026

23/04/2026

23/04/2026

19/04/2026

19/04/2026

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