The ADHD Coaching Circle

11/10/2026

Have you ever been told “you seem fine” when you tried to explain how much you’re struggling?

“You’re getting things done.”
“You were chatting earlier.”
“Everyone gets tired.”

For me, living with autism and ADHD means managing sensory overload, racing thoughts, executive dysfunction and conflicting needs. You might see me coping without seeing the exhaustion underneath.

I created this AuDHD Volcano to show what can build up beneath the surface while I’m trying to get through the day.

These struggles can be disabling, even when they’re invisible. Please believe me when I say I need support.

Share this with someone who needs to understand that appearing to cope doesn’t mean you’re okay.

30/08/2026

Get your RSD Reset Toolkit on the link in the comments!

For your free RSD trigger map, visit www.theadhdcoachingcircle.co.uk & sign up to our email list to reclaim ADHD!

This Worksheets item is sold by ADHDCoachingCircle. Ships from United States. Listed on Aug 28, 2026

06/08/2026

I've been thinking about a question that seems simple on the surface.

Who decides what "functioning" looks like?

For a long time, I believed functioning meant keeping up.

Going to work.

Meeting deadlines.

Being reliable.

Looking like I had everything under control.

If I could do those things, I assumed I was "doing well."

What people couldn't see was how much energy it took.

The masking.

The constant self-monitoring.

The evenings spent recovering.

The weekends when I had nothing left.

It made me wonder whether we'd confused appearing capable with actually being okay.

These days, I'm trying to ask myself different questions.

Do I have enough energy left to enjoy my life?

Am I building something that's sustainable?

Am I listening to my body before it forces me to stop?

Those questions feel much kinder than asking whether I'm "functioning."

I've written more about this in my latest Substack essay, Who Decides What 'Functioning' Looks Like? Link in comments.

💬 I'd love to hear your thoughts.

When you hear the word "functioning", what does it mean to you? Has that definition changed over time?

06/08/2026

Have you ever spent hours worrying about a conversation...
..only to discover later that the other person hadn't been thinking about it at all?

I know I have.

For a long time, I thought I was just "overthinking."

Now I understand something slightly different was happening.

My brain was treating possibility like proof.

The possibility that someone was annoyed with me became certainty.

The possibility I'd made a mistake became evidence I'd failed.

The possibility I'd be rejected felt as though rejection had already happened.

The interesting part is that my body couldn't tell the difference.

My heart raced.

My stomach dropped.

My mind started searching for more evidence to support the story.

That doesn't mean the feelings weren't real.

They absolutely were.

But the story driving them wasn't always the only explanation.

One question has changed so many of those moments for me:

What do I actually know & what am I assuming?

It's a simple question.

But sometimes it's enough to interrupt the spiral before it gathers momentum.

I've written more about this in my latest Substack essay, When Your Brain Treats Possibility Like Proof. Link in comments.

💬 Have you ever realised, after the fact, that your brain had filled in the blanks? What helped you notice it?

06/08/2026

Have you ever been absolutely convinced someone was annoyed with you...
..only to find out later they were just tired, distracted or dealing with something completely unrelated?

Our brains are brilliant at making sense of uncertainty.

The challenge is that they don't always tell us when they're filling in the gaps.

For years, I didn't realise how many stories I was telling myself.

"If they've gone quiet, I must have upset them."

"If I've made a mistake, everyone will think I'm incompetent."

"If I'm struggling, everyone else must be coping."

Those thoughts felt like facts.

Now I understand they were often assumptions shaped by past experiences, rejection sensitivity & years of trying to fit into systems that didn't always understand neurodivergent minds.

One question has helped me slow those moments down:

What story is my brain telling me right now?

Not because every worry is unfounded.

But because not every thought deserves to become a conclusion.

I've written more about this in my latest Substack essay, You Can't Change a Story You Don't Notice Yourself Telling. Link in comments.

This essay explores the next steps in the RECLAIM framework: Experience & Catch the Story. Before we can challenge our assumptions, we first need to notice the stories we're telling ourselves.

💬 What's one assumption you've caught yourself making that turned out not to be the whole story?

04/08/2026

For years, I thought I just hadn't found the right strategy.

Another planner.

A different app.

A better morning routine.

A more organised system.

Every time something didn't work, I assumed the problem was me.

Looking back, I don't think I was missing strategies.

I was missing awareness.

Because before we can decide what might help, we need to understand what's actually happening.

Is this burnout?

Is this rejection sensitivity?

Am I masking?

Is my nervous system overwhelmed by my environment?

Those experiences can all look similar on the surface, but they don't need the same response.

That idea became the first step in my RECLAIM framework: Recognise.

Not because awareness fixes everything.

But because it's much easier to choose helpful support when you understand the pattern you're responding to.

I've written more about this in my latest Substack essay, Why Awareness Comes Before Strategies. Link in the comments.

It's the first step in the RECLAIM framework I'm developing, learning to recognise patterns with curiosity rather than self-judgement.

💬 I'm curious, what's one pattern you've become better at recognising in yourself over time?

03/08/2026

"What if I don't want to be included?"

It's a question that sat with me for a long time.

As a late-diagnosed ADHDer, I spent years believing inclusion meant finally learning how to fit in. If I could just communicate better, cope better, mask better, maybe I'd finally belong.

But the more I learnt about neurodiversity, the more I questioned whether fitting in was really the goal.

Because if inclusion means being welcomed only when we behave more like everyone else... is that really inclusion?

Or is it assimilation?

For many of us, we've spent years exhausting ourselves trying to earn acceptance by hiding the very traits that make us neurodivergent.

What if support wasn't about helping us fit into systems that were never designed with us in mind?

What if it was about changing the conversation altogether?

That's the question that sparked the RECLAIM framework I'm developing.

Not "How do I become more acceptable?"

But "How do I understand myself, stop fighting my brain & build a life that actually works for me?"

I'd love to know what you think.

When you hear the word "inclusion", what does it mean to you?

Link in comments below for my latest essay on substack from the ADHD Reclaim series.

27/07/2026

Have you ever had an email completely ruin your day?

Not because it was objectively bad.

But because your brain filled in all the blanks before you'd even finished reading it.

"They're annoyed with me."

"I've messed something up."

"I'm about to get into trouble."

For a long time, I thought I was just "too sensitive."

Now I understand these moments are often patterns, not personal flaws.

When we can recognise the pattern, we have a much better chance of interrupting it before it becomes hours (or days) of spiralling.

It's the kind of explanation I wish someone had given me years ago.

And it's one of the reasons I'm creating more resources to help people recognise these patterns before they spiral.

Which slide resonated with you most?

18/04/2026

If rejection spirals leave you exhausted, ashamed, or stuck in overthinking for hours, this is exactly the work inside RSD Reset.

Not a fixed programme. Not a quick transformation.

A set of tools and supports designed to meet you
inside the spiral, not after it.

Across the RSD Reset (Trigger Map, Toolkit, course & group coaching), we move from:

confusion → understanding your patterns
panic → supporting your nervous system through the surge
rumination → interrupting loops without shame
self-blame → unlearning the “it must be me” narrative

And towards:

-awareness
-regulation
-boundaries
-reclaiming your ADHD identity

✨ You don’t need to become less sensitive. You need support that honours how your brain & body already work.

DM me RSD RESET if you want to explore the tools and find what fits for you.

14/04/2026

RSD reset: Your first thought isn’t always the truth.

The first thought is often your nervous system’s fastest prediction.

The second thought is where your self-awareness lives.

The work isn’t stopping the first story.

It’s building trust in your ability to gently question it.

That’s the difference between:

automatic shame
intentional response