31/05/2026
In casting aside tradition do we risk losing the psychological and emotional importance of a eulogised goodbye to our people?
Direct cremations are less expensive, but they leave families and friends without the chance to gather, collectively mourn and say their farewells to someone significant to their world. People need to connect and share in their sorrow.
Some people who opted for a Direct Cremation for someone they love have contacted me via my website in a state of profound, complicated grief and deep remorse. For them, a short term financial saving has created a long term emotional cost.
I am not alone in predicting how the post-pandemic rise in direct cremations would cause mental health issues in some. As if the pandemic didn’t take enough from us, it created a new normal of funerals with few or no mourners. The abject horror felt across the country due to legal restrictions for attendee numbers appears to have been all but forgotten.
To heal from a bereavement, you have to first mourn the death. The funeral service marks the first day of that healing.
The evolution of funeral services was necessary to meet modern societal expectations. However, the deeply profound purpose of a funeral service hasn’t changed one iota. We needed evolution, not revolution. The importance of funeral services has been insidiously eroded to such an extent that today, some people
consciously choose to forgo a service altogether in spite of costs, not because of them.
How we have always shown respect to those who’ve passed away whilst comforting those left behind should not be viewed as a relic of our past.
(People who request a direct cremation for themselves is another matter entirely but collectively paying your respects can take different forms so please speak to your local funeral director)
