Hi, my name is Natalie, and I am a counsellor specialising in baby loss. My life changed when I had my son Jack in 2002. He was born healthy, screaming, moving and a good weight, 7lb 7oz. We took him home, there were balloons, cards, flowers, toys! Then 3 days later there was silence. The cards changed from ‘congratulations’ to ‘sorry for your loss’. That was when I changed. I could never see a wa
y through my darkness. I didn’t want to talk to anyone, I didn’t want to go out, I didn’t want to see friends. I was living in an internal world, in shock, frightened to go out in case I saw a pram or a pregnant woman. Why should they have their baby and mine isn’t here? The anger came, I didn’t know that went alongside grief. It was just so painful! My friend gave me a phone number of a counsellor. After some time, I finally went to see her. The experience was amazing. I cried for the whole first session. Maybe because I was allowed to cry, no-one was there to hug me, to say that it was ok, when it really wasn’t! So here I am now, I’m a counsellor and I help other parents through what I went through. My son gave me a gift; a gift to understand and to empathise with a special group of parents that I never thought I would be a part of. If some of my story strikes a chord with you, please contact me, or see my page at: ‘Sleeping Angels Baby Loss Counselling’.