23/12/2025
Dementia is fast becoming one of the biggest age-related health challenges in the world, yet it remains one of the least talked about, especially in countries like Nigeria. As people live longer, more families are quietly being pulled into a life they never prepared for; watching a parent slowly forget, decline, and depend on others for the most basic things.
For me, this is no longer theory or statistics.
It is personal.
My father has dementia, and this past year has been one of the toughest years of my life. I had to leave my job to care for him full-time because we simply do not have enough professional caregivers in many parts of Nigeria who are trained and equipped to manage dementia patients properly. Even where care exists, it is often unaffordable or inadequate.
Some days, I feel like I am going nuts doing this job.
Not because I don’t love my father, but because dementia is relentless, even as a naturopath/clinical nutritionist/chef that I am. It demands your attention day and night. There are no breaks. No off days. You become the memory, the guard, the guide, and the strength for someone who once carried all those roles effortlessly.
What hurts the most is the contrast.
This is a man who was a superior police officer, a detective, a man of sharp instincts and discipline, very neat and detailed. Someone who could walk over 100 meters in one breath, alert, strong, and decisive. Now, I have to monitor him constantly, help him with simple daily activities, remind him where he is, guide his steps, and sometimes explain the same thing over and over again, patiently, gently, and sadly sometimes harshly, even when my own mind is exhausted.
Some days, empathy overwhelms me.
Other days, grief.
And on some days, pure mental fatigue.
Dementia doesn’t just affect the person diagnosed, it consumes the entire family, especially the primary caregiver. It drains you emotionally, psychologically, physically, and financially. Yet caregivers are often expected to “just cope,” to be strong, to endure in silence.
But we shouldn’t have to do this alone.
There are many of us out there; sons, daughters, spouses, quietly caring for aged parents with dementia. Many have put their careers on hold. Many are battling burnout. Many feel isolated, misunderstood, and unsupported.
I believe it’s time we create a community.
A community where:
1. We share real experiences without shame.
2. We support one another emotionally and morally.
3. We exchange practical caregiving tips that actually work.
4. We talk openly about caregiver burnout and mental health.
5. We remind each other that we are not weak for feeling tired.
This kind of support can help us care better for our parents while also protecting our own psychological well-being. Caring for someone with dementia is not just a duty, it is a heavy responsibility that requires collective strength, not isolation.
If you have an aged parent living with dementia, know this:
1. You are not alone.
2. Your exhaustion is valid.
3. Your love is seen.
And together, we can build something that helps us help them, without losing ourselves in the process.
🤍
This is my call to action.
If you are caring for an aged parent or loved one with dementia, especially here in Nigeria, let us find each other. Let us build a community where no caregiver feels abandoned, unheard, or overwhelmed.
A space where we:
1. Talk honestly about the struggles without judgment.
2. Share practical caregiving strategies that actually work in our environment.
3. Support one another psychologically, emotionally, and morally.
4. Advocate for better awareness and care for dementia in our society.
If this resonates with you, please comment, send a message, or say “I’m in.”
Your voice might be the relief someone else is silently praying for.
We cannot fix dementia, but together, we can reduce the loneliness, burnout, and pain of caregiving. We owe it to our parents who once stood strong for us, and to ourselves, so we do not break while doing this sacred work.
Let’s build this community.
Let’s carry this burden together.
🤍
Orolade Olanrewaju AbdulAzeez (Oníkòyí III)
MD, IBILE BIOCARE HERBAL CLINIC
