08/20/2026
We're part of a really amazing homeschool community, and the reason it's amazing is this. Participation!
As unschoolers we have the flexibility to do what we want, when we want, and that's really awesome. But you know what's also awesome? Belonging, and friendships, and experiences with others. And yes, sometimes these two things are in opposition to each other. If we focus only on the things WE like and that holds us back from participating in a community, is that really 'freedom'? I personally don't think so.
To me, being part of a community means showing up regularly, even when you don't feel like it that day, and getting involved in events that might not be your absolute favourite thing but are important to others. And the benefits are huge!
We had a great example of this in our house last week. Our homeschool group held our annual film festival. Getting closer to the date when films were due, my older two girls hadn't made a film. I was really encouraging them to, and one of them said to me, 'Mum, filmmaking just isn't my thing'. Now if you know me, you know that's totally ok! No one has to love a random topic. But a few things I also knew:
1- Making films was a big interest of some friends in the group.
2- She has enjoyed making films in the past so it wasn't something she really disliked a lot.
3- She wasn't keen to act in a film, but there are other ways to participate.
So we had a conversation about all these things! No, she didn't have to make a film, but there was more to consider than just 'do I feel like making a film right now'. Our experience matters, but also our friends' experience matters to us too!
Some of her friends love filmmaking. They'd put time and effort into creating something they were excited to share. So we show up for that, we contribute, we celebrate their thing, knowing that when it's our thing, we'd love them to show up too.
Not everything we do has to be our favourite thing. Sometimes the reason to participate is simply because it matters to someone else. And being part of a community means your favourite thing will come around soon too, and others invested in the community will also particpate even if it's not their favourite thing.
So they decided to make a film, and ended up having such fun doing it! The older two enlisted their younger sisters to act while they filmed, directed, and edited. And the film festival was brilliant. Everyone brought something to it, whether that was making a film, acting in one, helping someone else, watching, laughing, encouraging, or just being there.
I think we talk a lot about helping children find their interests, and obviously I believe deeply in giving them the freedom to do that. But I also want my kids to know that life isn't only about following your own interests. There are other reasons to do things, and sometimes they're not even about you. Sometimes you participate because you belong, because other people matter, and because community is something we all help create.
