06/06/2026
Something I wish I had started after the very first birth I attended as a doula was journaling.
Not charting. Not documenting. Simply reflecting. Reflecting on the families I have the privilege of supporting, the lessons they teach me, the strength they discover within themselves, and the moments that remind me why I chose this work. . . This week, I begin that journey.
As a busy and emotional week came to a dramatic standstill, I found myself sitting outside in the sunshine, listening to neighborhood children laugh and play and for a moment everything felt still.
My thoughts drifted to a client whose week had unfolded very differently. While I was enjoying the sunshine and sounds of my neighborhood, she remained in the postpartum unit, processing an unexpected turn in her pregnancy. At 27.5 weeks gestation, she was admitted to Labor & Delivery after her water broke. As a first-time mother, fear and uncertainty quickly set in. The childbirth education, birth planning, and feeding workshops we had planned for the coming weeks were suddenly condensed into a two-hour bedside session.
One of the greatest fears during a medical crisis is feeling like you've lost control. When plans change unexpectedly, it can seem as though decisions are being made around you rather than with you. The most valuable tool I carry as a doula isn't found in my birth bag, it is education.
That evening, we reviewed the B.R.A.I.N. decision-making tool and the following morning she began seeking clarification and had the cofidence to become an active participant in her care. The fear didn't disappear, but understanding brought a sense of calm.
Less than 24 hours later, everything changed again and at 28 weeks gestation, she was rushed into an emergency C-section and a beautiful baby entered the world. This tiny fighter arrived with a full head of hair and beautiful eyes which were wide open, listening to the sound of their father’s voice. Despite arriving 12 weeks early, baby and mom are doing remarkably well.
Doulas are not hired to be the loudest voice in the room, we are hired to help our clients find theirs. Our role is to provide education, support, and encouragement so families can make informed decisions and confidently communicate with their care team. Through education and support, we help families find confidence in their own voice.
This experience reminded me that birth is unpredictable. No amount of planning can guarantee how a journey will unfold. Sometimes the most important birth plan isn’t a list of preferences. It’s knowing how to ask questions, understand your options, and trust yourself when circumstances change. Stay flexible, stay informed, and trust the medical team you have chosen to care for you.
Today, I am thinking of this strong family and their little warrior as they begin their NICU journey. To this family: Thank you for allowing me to walk alongside you during one of the most unexpected and emotional chapters of your story. Your strength, courage, and advocacy for yourselves and your baby have been inspiring to witness.
