16/07/2024
A BODYMIND RENAISSANCE, Part 5: The Operating Room
There’s nothing quite like knowing you’re going to be unconscious and a group of total strangers are going to *remove several of your organs, while keeping you alive but at the same time unable to feel anything. This situation calls for SO MUCH trust in the hospital, the individuals, the drugs, and the universe or whatever deity with whom you are on speaking terms. The first person to put me at ease was my anesthesiologist. His name was Jay. He was beautiful, Older (that’s good, I thought.) He listened to what I said about a previous negative experience with anesthesia and understood immediately what had gone wrong. He promised to use a different approach and assured me that “we will take very good care of you.” I believed him. I would trust him with almost anything if I met him again today in just about any circumstance. Maybe this is something like the Stockholm Syndrome – I was so dependent on him I had to fall in love with him! Next up, as I was being wheeled into the operating room itself, was an encounter with the chief O.R. nurse. She was stern, humorless, in charge – but to ME, she was angelic. She said the same magic words, “Please don’t worry. We are going to take very good care of you.” I believed her, too. And then, finally, I was in the O.R. – what a bizarre place if you’re not used to it! Metal, machines, tubes, so many people crammed into the space, everyone suited up and busy, BRIGHT lights. And from the mist, just before I went under, Jay appeared at my side again, placing his hand on my wrist. He said it again, “Please don’t worry. We are going to take very good care of you.” And then everything went dark.
*In case you missed my initial post on July 12…
16 months ago I received an unwelcome piece of news... I was diagnosed with stage one endometrial cancer. In the coming weeks I learned so much about myself... how I react to bad news, how long it takes me to pick myself off the floor and get to work doing something about it, etc. I know many people have been through similar experiences, where your perspective shifts suddenly. I want to keep writing about this, because there's a lot to say...I hope you’ll follow me for awhile and contribute to the conversation if you want to. p.s. I appear to be cancer-free at present, thank you Jesus and everyone else.