Soteldo Psychotherapy

Soteldo Psychotherapy Soteldo Psychotherapy: IPV, coercive control, narcissistic abuse and trauma recovery.

Led by Raquel Soteldo, RP, CCC, MA, ABA, Registered Psychotherapist, Certified Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician, Founder & Clinical Director.

08/26/2026

💜 Constantly anticipating danger can leave the body and mind exhausted.

After prolonged narcissistic abuse, survivors may find themselves:

⚠️ Constantly on alert
😳 Easily startled
😮‍💨 Overwhelmed
🔋 Emotionally exhausted
🛑 Unable to relax
💭 Struggling to trust others

Chronic stress can affect many areas of functioning, including emotional, executive and physical functioning.

Understanding these responses can help survivors approach themselves with compassion rather than blame.

🌐 https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/26/2026

💜 Many survivors worry they won't be believed.

And sometimes, they don't fully believe themselves.

Intense psychological trauma, dissociation, self-judgment, and trauma bonds can make it difficult to understand why they continue returning to an abusive relationship.

They may also fear:

🔹 Being judged as weak
🔹 Being asked why they haven't left
🔹 Not being understood
🔹 Police or Children's Services being contacted without first discussing it with them

For professionals, recognizing these fears is an important part of creating trust.

Before we judge the return, we need to understand the trauma bond. 🫂

🌐 Website: https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 Resources & Support: https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/25/2026

🧠 When your nervous system is constantly activated, the effects can follow you into everyday life.

Living in ongoing fear or feeling unable to rest can affect how you experience:

💼 Work
👥 Friends
👶 Parenting
🏠 Family life
🧠 Everyday situations

The nervous system may remain activated even when you're physically away from the relationship.

Recognizing this impact can help survivors better understand what they're experiencing—and approach themselves with compassion. 💜

🌐 https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/25/2026

🚨 One incident rarely tells the whole story.

In this clinician training, the Gabby Petito case is discussed through the BRAVE framework and the importance of looking beyond the immediate incident.

Professionals are encouraged to:

💜 Believe the client's distress
🔎 Recognize patterns
🗣️ Ask privately and directly
🛡️ Verify immediate risks
🤝 Support and empower options

If two people are simply told to separate for the night but continue traveling together in the same vehicle, what other safety measures and support systems should be considered?

Family. Social networks. Resources. Safety planning.

Understanding coercive control means asking about the pattern—not just responding to the moment.

🌐 Website: https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 Resources & Support: https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/24/2026

🚩 Control is not an expression of love.

Jealousy is not protection.
Monitoring is not care.
Fear is not respect.

One incident can be a significant red flag. Looking at repetition, escalation, consequences and loss of freedom can help reveal a larger pattern—but you don't need to stay in an unsafe situation just to define that pattern.

If you feel unsafe, your safety matters. 💜

🌐 https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/24/2026

🚨 What happens when we focus on the incident instead of the larger pattern?

In this training case, the client describes coercive control and monitoring involving her Tesla, along with an allegation of physical violence. She is also visibly distressed.

The BRAVE framework encourages professionals to:

💜 Believe the distress
🔎 Recognize patterns
🗣️ Ask privately
🛡️ Verify immediate risks

A survivor's behavior or reaction doesn't exist in isolation.

Understanding what happened before the reaction can be critical when assessing possible coercive control.

🌐 Website: https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 Resources & Support: https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/23/2026

💜 Coercive control can gradually distort a person's sense of reality.

When someone repeatedly challenges or distorts your truth, you may eventually start relying on them to tell you what is real and what happened.

Over time, this can affect your identity, sense of self, perception and judgment.

When you're also living in a trauma response, it can become incredibly difficult to move, make decisions or leave.

Understanding this isn't about blaming the survivor. It's about understanding the impact of the pattern. 💜

🌐 https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/23/2026

🚨 “She just gets worked up sometimes.”

In this clinician training, the Gabby Petito case is examined to explore how blame can quickly shift toward the person experiencing distress.

Instead of looking at what may have caused the distress, attention can become focused on:

⚠️ Her reaction
⚠️ Her emotional state
⚠️ What she may have done

For frontline professionals, it's important to look beyond the immediate explanation and consider the larger context.

🔎 What happened before the reaction?
🧠 What patterns might be present?

Understanding coercive control requires looking beyond what is immediately visible. 💜

🌐 Website: https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 Resources & Support: https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/22/2026

Coercive Control: How Abuse Can Distort Your Reality & Identity

Coercive control is a pattern—not simply one isolated incident.

It can include monitoring phones and locations, controlling finances, withholding attention or affection, threatening to take away children, humiliation, damaging belongings, gaslighting and repeated blame-shifting.

Over time, these patterns can affect a survivor's sense of reality, identity, judgment and self-trust.

When someone repeatedly distorts your perception of what is happening, you may begin relying on them to determine what is true. This can make it increasingly difficult to recognize the abuse, trust yourself or understand why leaving feels so difficult.

💜 Recognizing the pattern can be an important step toward understanding what you're experiencing.

🌐 https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

08/22/2026

💜 A distressed reaction doesn't tell us the whole story.

In this clinician training, the Gabby Petito case is used to discuss how frontline professionals can look beyond the immediate incident and consider the larger context.

The discussion highlights:

🔎 Visible distress and body language
⚠️ How blame can shift toward the survivor
🧠 The importance of understanding what happened before the reaction
💜 Why context matters when assessing possible coercive control

One powerful question for professionals:

Are we examining the whole pattern—or only the moment we can see?

🌐 Website: https://soteldopsychotherapyclinic.ca/
🔗 Resources & Support: https://linktr.ee/narcclinic

Address

2211 Riverside Road 404
Ottawa, IL

Opening Hours

Monday 11am - 6pm
Tuesday 11am - 6pm
Wednesday 11am - 6pm
Thursday 11am - 6pm
Friday 11am - 6pm
Saturday 11am - 6pm

Telephone

+16134000128

Website

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