Gokalia Sacred Space

08/27/2026

When I first started my journey, I never understood what the elders meant when they said that when starting your journey, you must be married or have children—or that when seeking a shaman master, you should pay attention to who they are as a partner and a parent.

I don't have those titles. And embarking on this journey, I've questioned my worth a lot. Do I even belong here? Is this all in my head? Am I worthy of carrying such a sacred title?

Walking this journey I think I finally understand some of the wisdom behind that ideology.

Pay attention to how someone treats the partner they chose to create a life with. Pay attention to how they raise their children. Pay attention to their parenting style and the relationship they embody with their long-term partner.

Because those relationships can give you a glimpse into who someone is at their core—their character, their values, how they love, how they respond when things are difficult, and how they care for the people entrusted to them.

And I feel forever blessed to receive such kind, genuine, and supportive love from my xifu.

At the very beginning of my journey, my heart was so heavy. There was a part of me that deeply craved a mother's love. And throughout all this time with my xifu she has shown me, time and time again, unconditional love.

In moments when it would've been easier to yell at me. In moments when it would've been easier to show disappointment. In moments when I didn't know what I was doing and was simply trying to learn. She continued to show me grace.

She understood what it meant to be a beginner in this line of work. She gave me room to make mistakes, learn, question, grow, and become.

There is something so sacred about receiving a version of love that I've yearned for for so long. And I'm still learning every day what it feels like to receive healthy love—love that is supportive, reciprocal, patient, and safe.

I couldn't be more grateful that she is such a great mother and a great wife, because I now understand how those pieces of her are also part of what makes her such an amazing shaman master.

Learning and growing together has been one of the most beautiful things to unravel. I've had to let go of this wild expectation of what a shaman "should" and "should not" be and learn instead what it means to truly embody our most authentic selves.

I know I would not have accelerated this fast or this deeply without the trust my xifu has placed in me. Her trust has given me room to trust myself, too.

So today, on her birthday, I just want to honor her.

May you continue embodying the love, grace, strength, wisdom, and authenticity that you have shown me throughout this journey. May you know that the way you love and lead has given me motivation and strength to continue walking mine.

I hope that as I continue growing into who I am meant to become, I can honor everything you've poured into me—not by becoming you, but by becoming more fully myself.

Thank you for trusting me.
Thank you for teaching me.
Thank you for giving me grace.
And thank you for showing me a kind of love I didn't know I was allowed to receive.

Happy birthday, Beauty Of Oneness 🤍

08/26/2026

08/25/2026

There’s this piece of me that has been feeling dismissed, misunderstood, and like what I go through doesn’t matter.

Through journaling, opening my heart, and trying to express myself with the words I currently have in my vocabulary, I’ve realized that sometimes I’m still not able to fully articulate my personal experiences.

Life has been this weird mix of growth and blockages. It feels like I’m accelerating and living some of the best moments of my life, while somehow also reaching the depths of my darkness again so quickly. And I’ve been wondering why I feel this way.

Then something became clearer to me. To some people, my life may look privileged. Like I’ve never truly struggled. To others, the things I struggle with might “not be that deep.” Maybe I’m overthinking. Maybe I’m making something bigger than it needs to be. And it puts me back into this weird pickle I feel like I’ve been in my whole life:

Maybe what I’m going through isn’t worthy enough to be considered a problem.

But isn’t part of the point of our growth to allow future generations to struggle less than we did? To give them the support we wish we had so they can take the next step?

How can you tell little me that her problems weren’t worthy of being problems simply because you were going through something more complex?

Where did we lose enough compassion to understand that some wounds are so deep that the memory has already faded, but the feeling still lingers in the body?

The other day, I recognized little me crying. And yes, crying is healthy. But there comes a point where a child cries for so long without feeling safe or supported that eventually they learn to fend for themselves. I think I learned that very young without realizing that was what I was doing.

I’ve come this far in life relying on my own two hands and my own two feet. I might not have the best things. My life might not be perfect. But I am really proud of what I have achieved using my own willpower.

Despite others seeing me as privileged. Despite others believing my problems aren't that deep. I'm owning up to my wounds and blockages and giving it the care it needs to continue moving forward in life.

We all come into this world carrying baggage—some of it ours, some of it inherited, and some of it we may never fully recognize because it began generations before us. But that doesn’t mean we have to continue carrying all of it. And in the spaces where people can be judgy, I’m choosing to take a step back. I’m choosing to understand that we all struggle differently.

I may be privileged enough to not have experienced what you experienced. But you may also be privileged enough to have never experienced what I have endured. Neither one has to take away from the other.

The words may not fully form yet. I may still be learning how to explain some of the things that have been living inside of me for years. But there is something so beautiful about finally finding people who truly know and understand me—and hearing someone articulate back exactly what has been killing me inside.

So in a world where we can choose so many things, I hope we choose kindness. I hope we choose compassion. Because someone should never have to prove that their pain is painful enough before we decide it deserves care.

08/24/2026

I travel far and wide,
and into the depths of the darkness,
to call for you.

Not to force you,
but to allow you the permission,
in your own autonomy,
For you to trust me—
to guide me to the places where you may have left fragments of your souls,
to guide you back home.

Maybe it is where you work,
where your mind is still focused
even when your body has already left.

Maybe it is somewhere in nature,
where your spirit found so much beauty
you simply did not want to come home.

Or maybe pieces of you remain
in people and spaces where wounds were opened
and create heartbreak, sadness, and depression.

I want you to know that I am here.

Not as somebody to fix you,
but as somebody to witness you
and guide you back home.

To remind you of your strength.
Of how loved you are.
To ground you.
To help you recognize all the things you do have in this life.
To empower you so that you remember the path home.

And if you do not trust my voice yet, I have tools to help us communicate with one another.

I will turn on the light for you
so you can remember where your house is.

I will burn incense
to create a trail for you to find home.

And I will leave your favorite fruits and snack for you
in the event that we may miss each other.

I hope you know
you have a home
filled so deeply with love,
with people who care so much about you,
with people who want you to come home.

I will use my tools,
my txiab neeb
as the middle ground
where we push and pull,
where we show evidence
to the spirit world
and the physical world:

Yes. You have arrived safely.

I will use my split horns
and have your spirit showcase
that you have entered the home,
that you recognize it,
and that you know
this is rightfully yours.

As a shaman, I am here to provide evidence for you.
I am here to be your voice to empower you.
I am here to acknowledge and recognize
what you have been through.

And I am here to let you know:

You are worthy to stay.
May your spirit always find its way home.

And if it doesn't,
may you know there is a community out there to support you, who genuinely care for you,
for your soul, and for your well-being.

08/07/2026

After many seasons of "tough love", emotionally unavailability, love bombing, and intensity, it feels so good to be loved so softly. Im grateful for my time in solitude where it allowed me to give myself the love I needed. And now in this season, accepting love feels so easy and effortless.

07/23/2026

Take time to look into your crystal ball. The vision you have for yourself is the most powerful.

~ I have been hard on myself this year setting high expectation and wondering why I do not yeild any results of "success." However, 2026 has been a transformative year for me rewriting the script and healing in spaces that brought me trauma. Somehow the energy is shifting and I feel the rest of 2026 is going to be balls deep amazing, more than i can even fathom. Im reminding myself to stay consistent in allowing time to process after being triggered and to trust in my guides to lead me to spaces that aligns with my vision.

Thank you to my sister and Kue The Photographer for this last minute photoshoot. If youre in nc and looking for a photographer you should schedule an appointment with her!

07/18/2026

I often wonder, as an educator, how do I truly honor my Hmong roots, culture, and identity in the work that I do?

Since beginning my spiritual journey, it has felt less like learning something new and more like coming home—to the ancestral knowledge that has always existed within our people. It has made me question my work often. Are we truly empowering Hmongness, or are we unintentionally placing Hmong language and traditions inside frameworks that were never created by us? Are we preserving our ways of knowing, or are we simply adding a Hmong label onto someone else's construct?

These are questions I sit with often.

But recently, I witnessed something that felt incredibly special. I watched two worlds collide—not in conflict, but in harmony. I saw my professional work and my ancestral wisdom meet. Instead of feeling separate, they naturally integrated with one another.

It reminded me that we don't have to recreate who we are. We don't have to manufacture culture or force identity. Our role is simply to create spaces where our truths can be lived naturally.

The more I reflect, the more I realize that Hmong ways of knowing have always carried a deep spiritual understanding of the world. That wisdom has always been woven into how we cared for one another, how we understood relationships, nature, community, and our place within it.

What brings me the most joy is realizing that the world I've been yearning for isn't somewhere far away. It's already here.

I just needed the awareness to recognize it.

Every time I intentionally embed our cultural lens into education, into community, and into everyday moments, it feels effortless because it's authentic. And authenticity has a way of inviting others to become curious about their own lineage, their own ancestral wisdom, and the knowledge that has always lived within them.

Maybe this is how we move forward—not by building something entirely new, but by remembering what has always been ours and making it so natural that the next generation never has to question whether they belong.

They'll simply know.

07/10/2026

Confirmation message:

Your prayers have been answered even before you asked.