24/12/2024
“They can’t apologize if you don’t tell them what they did wrong.” Ugh. At this time of year there’s a big push to “forgive and forget.” People who aren’t comfortable with healthy boundaries may intervene and try to persuade you to tell the person how they hurt you, convinced they’ll apologize and everyone can be happy together again.
But the truth is, there was never happiness, just control. Narcissists love to hear how they’ve hurt you. It makes them feel powerful. They also love an opportunity to publicly “apologize,” usually with some grand gesture or speech that gives them a ton of attention. The bigger truth is, you’ve told them multiple times how their behavior hurts you and they never change.
When someone tries this tactic, simply tell them:
“They can’t apologize” because they’re not sorry.
