29/07/2026
Have you ever noticed that the child who is crying gets support, but the child who goes quiet is often expected to "be fine"?
We tend to notice dysregulation when it's loud.
But dysregulation isn't defined by volume. It's defined by a nervous system that has become overwhelmed.
Some children externalise their stress:
• Crying
• Arguing
• Yelling
• Throwing things
Others internalise it:
• Shutting down
• Going silent
• Agreeing with everything
• Withdrawing
• Wanting to escape
Neither response tells us how much a child is struggling.
It only tells us how their nervous system responds to stress.
The quiet child isn't necessarily coping better. They may simply be coping differently.
As parents, teachers and caregivers, we need to notice the children who don't ask for help as much as those who can't stop asking.
Have you ever realised your child was overwhelmed only after they became quiet?
If so, what was the sign you almost missed?
— Krysten Taprell | The Therapist Parent
📚 More evidence-based parenting resources:
www.thetherapistparent.com
