Wildflower Mama

25/02/2025

It is normal that you want to hug and hold and kiss and nurse your baby (day and night).

It is normal that your baby doesn’t want to be separated from you; her survival instincts are strong. She isn’t manipulating, she is communicating. She believes that you and she are one, not two. And on a subconscious level, maybe you do too.

It is normal that she reacts and cries when she can’t see you to bring you back into proximity; that is a healthy response, which will naturally change over time, but it is not to be squashed or questioned or judged.

It is normal that you don’t want to leave her. That when someone offers for you to have a night out or to leave your baby that after you’ve been gone for an hour or just a few minutes your heartstrings are being pulled. As much as you need a break and some me time, the magnetism of your connection is drawing you back to her.

It doesn’t mean you’re weak or needy. It means you’re bonding with your baby on a deeply emotional and physiological level.

In the early days, she physically needs you to help regulate her bodily systems, like heat and heart rate and her breathing. As she grows into a toddler and beyond she relies on you to co-regulate her emotions. She is calm when she is with you. You are her home.

Your loving interactions are firing and wiring her brain to believe that the world is a safe place. You are teaching her that she can trust others. You are fostering her ability to form healthy relationships in the future.

This time goes by oh so fast and before you know it she will be taking steps away from you. Take solace in the fact that her independence will one day be strong as you’ve patiently laid the foundations through a framework of healthy dependence and attachment.

Enjoy this time mama! Revel in this baby bliss. Surrender, close your eyes and fall into the great unknown that is waiting for you. She is in love with you for a reason – you’re her amazing mama and she knows exactly how to guide you.

Raised Good

via L.R.Knost - Little Hearts/Gentle Parenting Resources

06/02/2025

Sara Wickham explains Archie Cochrane's aphorism, and shows how this links with an important bit of decision making related wisdom.

24/11/2024

The Birth Trauma Tree emphasises the diverse root causes of birth trauma, each uniquely experienced by the affected woman or her partner. Whether she encounters one, some, or all of these causes, the key concern is not the specifics but rather the emotional impact and how she perceives her birth experience.

These root causes and subsequent trauma can deepen when the experience is ignored, misdiagnosed, or unsupported. This neglect nurtures the roots of trauma, allowing them to take hold and grow into visible symptoms, which may manifest as PTSD, postnatal depression, or other mental health challenges.

Acknowledging the impact of a traumatic birth is essential.
For those caring for postpartum women, recognising the signs of trauma is crucial. Paying attention to these indicators can make a significant difference in their healing 💜

30/07/2024