02/06/2026
It occurred to me this week while I was thinking about how proud I am of Char on our walks, that we’re both less anxious and reactive these days.
When did I jump back on here and start my walks and routines again? December. So it’s been about five months.
Before that, there were probably six or seven months of just surviving.
If you’re in fight-or-flight right now and can’t imagine how you’ll ever feel better, this was my timeline. I’m still not all the way there, but I’m closer than I’ve been in a long time.
Over the past month, I’ve noticed Charli now walks past all dogs, even the small white fluffy ones, with little to no reaction. I’ve also noticed I’ve started smiling at people and saying good morning again. Even men…
We’re back, baby.
Slowly but surely, the clouds have started to part and the sun is coming out again.
For those still in it, at the very beginning of it, or still stuck in the situation that’s causing it, I’m here for you. You will find your way through.
The answer isn’t glamorous. It’s just getting up every day and staying consistent. Even when it feels like it’s changing absolutely nothing. Even when months go by and you wonder if you should just stay in bed instead.
Go for a little walk.
Eat some delicious, healthy food.
Start a nighttime routine.
Stay in the shower longer than you need to.
Go to bed at 7pm.
Read more.
Push yourself to see your best friends, even if they’re miles away.
Be strong at work and take time off if you need to.
Say no occasionally.
Yell at a few people and learn from it.
Don’t beat yourself up too much.
Listen to music really loudly and sing.
Cry a lot and don’t feel guilty about it.
Talk about the same things over and over. Your good friends will listen.
One day you’ll realise you’ve stopped crying so much. Stopped repeating the story. Stopped fighting what happened.
You’ll start feeling grateful again.
And maybe you’ll book a solo trip to Europe, and finally feel free enough to be yourself again.
Healing isn’t one big moment. It’s hundreds of tiny decisions that don’t seem to matter until one day you realise they did.