14/02/2025
✨ Questions vs Lectures when Parenting ✨
I see time and time again, parents often using a lecturing approach to teaching their children. Whilst kids need to understand right from wrong and how to do things, stepping back a bit and letting go of control is powerful to support our kids learn, grow and build resilience.
We want to teach our kids HOW to think, not WHAT to think. I recently heard this statement and it landed for me as a parent. Helping our children to be curious, ask questions and problem solve without stepping in to give answers, or tell them the “right” way of doing things (according to us), lets them know we trust in their ability to navigate the task or situation at hand.
Lecturing and being told what to do all the time is disempowering and, at times, annoying for our kids and for us as adults. Now, I’m not saying to ignore tricky behaviours and let them run wild. I’m saying…
🌈 Step back and let them do the puzzle themselves, with your support.
🌈 Step back and support them to navigate tricky social situations by asking questions, instead of rushing to the teacher to intervene at school
🌈 Step back and support the sibling relationship, by guiding them with questions about how to resolve problems together
🌈 Step back and provide encouragement when your child is becoming frustrated that they can’t build lego- instead of telling them how to.
Notice the changes that come when our kids see that we believe in their abilities and skills to navigate the challenges that life throws their way 💕