30/08/2026
I’ve waited about 15 years for this 🥹
I was 21 when I had Ethan and 22 when I started nursing at Queen’s. He was just 5 months old
I’d grown up in foster care, had lived on my own since I was 17 and didn’t have anyone to fall back on. Most of my memories of those years are really happy ones, but there were moments when it all felt too much
I remember sitting at university wondering what the hell I was doing. It just felt too hard at times. There were times I came very close to dropping out. Times I questioned whether I could manage university and a baby, and probably most painfully, whether trying to build a career meant I wasn’t being a good enough mum to my little boy
There wasn’t really anyone to tell me “keep going, you can do this.” So somehow, I had to learn to tell myself.
Then Jesus Take the Wheel came out
I’m not religious, and it was never about Jesus for me. It was the feeling behind the song, those moments when you’re trying so hard to hold everything together and you just need to believe somehow, it’s all going to be okay
And my Ethan loved to sing it for me ❤️
Then he grew up. And like most boys, stopped singing on demand for his mum 😂
For probably the last 15 years, whenever he’s asked what I want for my birthday, I’ve given him the same answer
“Sing Jesus Take the Wheel for me.”
Every year…. A hard “NO” 😂
Yesterday I turned 46
And after all those years of asking, my 24yr old son sang it for me
And suddenly I wasn’t 46
For a minute, he was my 9 year old boy again…
and I was that twenty something year old, trying desperately to make something of our lives and wondering if I was doing any of it right
If I could go back, I would tell her - stop doubting yourself
That little boy is going to grow into a man you couldn’t be prouder of. You ARE going to become a nurse. You’re going to build a life you can’t even imagine yet
And one day, 20 years from now, you’ll sit in a room with that little boy, all grown up, while he sings your song back to you
And you’ll realise…
you did alright, kid ❤️
And look at his little sister Sienna cheering him on in the background 🥹
