Sarah O’Callaghan Therapy

Sarah O’Callaghan Therapy Accredited CBT and EMDR psychotherapist
Parental Burnout Specialist
North East and Nationwide

When people think about exhaustion in motherhood, they often picture sleepless nights, tantrums, endless laundry, and th...
04/06/2026

When people think about exhaustion in motherhood, they often picture sleepless nights, tantrums, endless laundry, and the physical demands of raising children.

But there’s another kind of exhaustion that’s rarely talked about.

The exhaustion of a mind that never switches off.

The endless analysing.The replaying of conversations.The second-guessing of decisions.The responsibility OCD convinces you to carry for every possible outcome.

Parenting is already filled with uncertainty. There are no guarantees, no perfect decisions, and no way to know for sure you’re getting everything right.

For someone with OCD, that’s a particularly difficult place to live.

Because OCD doesn’t just want you to be a good parent.

It wants certainty that you’re a good parent.

And that’s a standard nobody can meet.

If you’re parenting with OCD and feeling completely depleted, there may be a reason you’re so tired that has nothing to do with sleep.

❤️ Save this post for the days you wonder why you’re exhausted.

I remember having my first and nobody warned me that they just don’t always go back to sleep after a feed!Pacing the flo...
03/06/2026

I remember having my first and nobody warned me that they just don’t always go back to sleep after a feed!

Pacing the floor, willing them to settle again, while they’re just… awake. For what feels like no reason.

I feel like there are a few hidden truths about having a baby that no one really talks about. Or maybe we just subconsciously forget until we’re back in it again.

Another one is intrusive thoughts with a newborn. Not spoken about out of shame and believing that they mean something terrible about ourselves or our ability as a parent.

👉What if they stop breathing and I don’t realise?

👉What if I fall asleep and something happens?

👉What if I’m too exhausted tomorrow and I can’t cope?

👉What if I harm them and I don’t realise?

Intrusive thoughts are something we all get. Random, unwanted, often ridiculous thoughts that pop in and out. You probably didn’t notice them when you weren’t a parent as suddenly the weight of responsibility hits different, and it feels too risky to not pay attention to such thoughts.

‼️The difference is what we do with them next‼️

If we start treating them as meaningful or dangerous, our brain starts paying attention. Checking, reassuring and avoiding. Trying to solve them or get control over them.

➡️Save this post as a reminder of what’s actually ‘normal’ when you next have that wave of panic or dread amongst the chaos of a newborn ⬅️

Worries in motherhood are often transient.One worry feels solved…and another one quickly pops up in its place.So it’s no...
26/05/2026

Worries in motherhood are often transient.

One worry feels solved…and another one quickly pops up in its place.

So it’s no surprise that now the sun’s been out for a couple of days, this has become a familiar conversation in my therapy room with mums with contamination OCD.

“The thing I can’t get over is how other mums DON’T seem to be thinking the same way.”

How are they not worrying about the ingredients?
How are they not researching it all?
How are they able to relax at the beach whilst you’re mentally calculating risks the entire time?

And the frustrating part is… you don’t WANT to think like this.

You wish you could just grab the sun cream, enjoy the sunshine and move on.

But when you’re responsible for making decisions for your child, how are you supposed to not worry?

That’s often the trap OCD creates in motherhood.

It convinces you that good parenting means preventing every possible harm.That if you stop worrying, stop researching or stop checking… you are being irresponsible.

So while other people see ‘just sun cream’, your brain sees threat, responsibility and guilt.

The more responsible you feel, the more impossible it becomes to switch off.

And because OCD targets the things you care about most, motherhood can become one long internal risk assessment.

Save this post if your brain turns everyday parenting decisions into impossible responsibility ☀️

🍾🎉Celebrating the end of 22 years of NHS service this weekend and feeling mixed emotions as I reflect on the many places...
08/03/2026

🍾🎉Celebrating the end of 22 years of NHS service this weekend and feeling mixed emotions as I reflect on the many places I’ve worked and roles I’ve had - while also excited to step fully into self-employment.

From a part-time role in pathology labs while finishing my first degree, to care work with people with complex disabilities, training as a mental health nurse, working in forensics and children’s services, and stepping into clinical leadership - before returning to university a third time to train as a therapist. Each of these roles has shaped me and made me the therapist I am today.

Over the last two years I’ve been building my own private practice alongside NHS work. As demand has grown, I’ve learned that doing both isn’t sustainable. Burnout has been real, but it has also allowed me to save enough to take on this next project — though I know too well how working at this level can be harmful.

On this International Women’s Day, I’m taking a moment to practice what I preach. I’m proud of how far I’ve come, excited to step into a new adventure: , and looking forward to what comes next. My existing work and clients will transfer to the new premises, where we’ll continue offering therapy alongside a wider range of support through our amazing associates.

Change can feel daunting, but it’s also the space where growth happens — and I’m ready for it. 🌿

If you’re a perfectionist mum, you probably don’t experience parenting as “doing your best”.You experience it as carryin...
16/02/2026

If you’re a perfectionist mum, you probably don’t experience parenting as “doing your best”.

You experience it as carrying the responsibility for how everything turns out.

For their confidence.
For their emotional wellbeing.
For their friendships.
For their future.

And when your brain assumes “If something goes wrong, it will be because I missed something”, parenting stops feeling like guidance… and starts feeling like risk management.

In CBT, we call this responsibility bias — a thinking pattern where we overestimate how much control we have and how much blame we would carry if things aren’t perfect.

It doesn’t mean you care too much.
It means your mind is treating parenting like a system that must be optimised, monitored, and protected at all times.

No wonder you feel exhausted.

If this resonates, you’re not alone — and this is very workable in therapy.

💬 Tell me in the comments: do you tend to overthink decisions before they happen, or replay them after?

📩 Or message me if you want support with perfectionism, parenting anxiety, or the mental load that comes with trying to get everything “right”.

Nothing like a four-month gap in blogging to show I’m a very busy, very imperfect parent! 🙈I’m back with some reflection...
15/02/2026

Nothing like a four-month gap in blogging to show I’m a very busy, very imperfect parent! 🙈

I’m back with some reflections on pre-teens and tricky feelings- those moments that are messy, emotional, and very real.

Recently, my son reached his limit at rugby after weeks of being bullied. We acknowledged his frustration and how overwhelming it felt for him, but we were also firm that lashing out isn’t acceptable, and there were clear consequences.

Finding the balance between understanding their emotions and holding boundaries is one of the hardest parts of parenting at this stage.

We’ve known the benefits of this approach for years. From my experience as a former eating disorder nurse, calm but firm, direct but nurturing, boundaries paired with compassion have always worked. It’s not about terminology or trends- it’s about consistency, empathy, and modelling resilience, even on the messy days.

Just in time for Children’s Mental Health Week, a reminder that showing up, setting limits, and supporting our children through big feelings really matters.

💛 I’d love to know if any of this resonates with you - let me know what you think! Link in bio and on stories.

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