The Real Me Therapy

The Real Me Therapy A qualified ADHD coach, transformational coach, integrative Psychotherapist and Somatic Experience practitioner. Supporting healing and change.

18/08/2026

Your nervous system knows how to complete an activation cycle. You keep interrupting it.

Animals in the wild do this constantly and effortlessly.

A deer being chased by a predator — full sympathetic activation, escape, then literally shaking the energy out of the body and returning to grazing.
No rumination. No medication. No protocol.
Just the cycle completing.

Human beings interrupt this process.
We feel the beginning of activation and immediately reach for something to stop it.
The phone. The food. The drink. The logical explanation. The breathing technique used not to resource — but to escape.
And because the cycle never completes — the activation never fully discharges.

It stays in the body. Accumulating. Building.
Until the capacity is so low that even small triggers produce enormous responses.
Your body knows how to do this.
It has always known.

You just have to stop getting in the way.
What do you do to interrupt your activation cycle before it can complete?

Tell me below.

14/08/2026

This week I delivered a free masterclass to 78 people and forgot to record it.

I re-recorded it the next morning.
I finished module seven of the Level 3 accredited course I'm writing.

I played golf with a scratch player and a four handicap — my handicap is 36 — and stayed in the discomfort instead of shrinking from it.
I built two new products from scratch.
And I'm still here. Not overwhelmed. Not burned out. Not running on adrenaline and cortisol and sheer willpower.
Actually here.

A year ago — even six months ago — a week like this would have floored me. The pressure of it. The visibility. The uncertainty of whether any of it would land. My nervous system would have found a way to sabotage it or escape it before it got too real.

This week I just showed up. Every day. Did the next thing. Managed my expectations. Regulated when I needed to. And kept going.
That's not motivation. That's not discipline.
That's a nervous system that has been given enough new information — through enough consistent practice — to know that the discomfort isn't going to destroy me.
That's the work.

And it's available to anyone willing to do it.
If you want to understand how your nervous system works — and what becomes possible when you do

Message me the word Masterclass and I will send it to you

One hour. Free. Watch it this weekend.

What does your week look like when you stop fighting your nervous system and start working with it? Tell me below.

12/08/2026

78 people registered. I forgot to record it. So I did it again.

Last night I ran a free masterclass on why your brain works the way it does.

An hour on your nervous system. Why ADHD is not an attention deficit. Why you avoid, freeze, and can't get started. And what actually changes when you finally understand it.
I forgot to hit record.

So this morning I recorded it again. And I'm giving it away for free. Permanently.

No diagnosis needed. No prior knowledge. No cost.
Just one honest hour that could change how you understand yourself.

Message me the word Masterclass and I will send you the link.

01/08/2026

I used to never find joy in anything.
Not because I was depressed.

Because I was surviving.

My nervous system was so consumed with what was next, what was wrong, what needed fixing — that it didn't know how to receive a moment. How to just be in something without scanning it for the threat in it.

This morning I got back from a two-hour trail run with my running club.

Six o'clock in the morning. Countryside. Fresh air.
All the way through winter there were just two of us. Two people showing up in the dark and the cold because we both knew what it gave us.
Wednesday morning — sixteen people turned up.

And standing there on the trails with that small community around me — I felt it. That thing I couldn't feel for most of my adult life.
Joy. Simple, uncomplicated joy.

Not from an achievement. Not from hitting a target or closing a deal or ticking something off a list.
Just from showing up. Moving my body. Being in nature. Being with people who get it.

That's what a regulated nervous system gives you.
Not just better focus. Not just less overwhelm.
The ability to actually receive your own life.
If you want to understand how your nervous system works — and what becomes possible when it does

I'm running a free masterclass on Monday 10th August at 6.30pm.
Why Your Brain Works the Way It Does.
One hour. Free. Online.

Link in bio to register.

Message me the word Masterclass and I will send the free registration link

31/07/2026

Stop asking permission to trust yourself.

The permission was always yours to give.
This week in Relentless we went into self-trust. The real version of it. Not the motivational poster version.

The reason most people don't trust themselves isn't a lack of intelligence or capability.
It's a nervous system that learned — somewhere along the way — that its own judgement wasn't safe. That the cost of being wrong was too high. That it was better to look outside for answers than to risk trusting the ones inside.

And so they keep asking. Keep looking. Keep waiting for someone to tell them it's okay to do the thing they already know they need to do.
Here's what I know after fifteen years of this work:
The answer is almost always already there. In the body. In the quiet underneath the noise. In the part of you that knows — before the mind starts arguing.

Self-trust is not the absence of doubt.
It's the decision to move forward in the presence of it.

If this is where you are — the free masterclass is for you. Monday 10th August, 6.30pm. Why Your Brain Works the Way It Does. One hour. Free

Link in bio to register.

What would you stop asking permission for if you fully trusted yourself?
Tell me in the comments.

30/07/2026

The only reason you feel anxious about it is because of what you're focused on.

Not because the thing is dangerous.
Because your attention has gone to what could go wrong. What you can't control. The worst version of the outcome.

Anxiety is not a warning signal about the future.
It's information about where your focus currently lives.

And attention is something you can move.
Not by forcing positive thinking. Not by telling yourself it'll all be fine.
By asking a different question.
Not "what if this goes wrong" — but "what am I moving toward."
Not "what if I fail" — but "what does getting this right look and feel like."

You have spent years navigating genuinely difficult things. Situations that were actually hard. What you're facing now is not harder than that.
It's just uncertain.
And uncertainty is not the same as danger.
Your nervous system hasn't learned that yet. But it can.

That's exactly what I'm covering in my free masterclass — Monday 10th August at 6.30pm. Why your brain works the way it does. One hour. Free.

Link in bio.

What are you focused on right now that's making you anxious? And what are you actually moving toward? Tell me below.

# Focus

The reason you keep asking other people what to do.It's not because you don't know the answer.It's because you don't yet...
27/07/2026

The reason you keep asking other people what to do.

It's not because you don't know the answer.
It's because you don't yet trust that your answer is enough.

Self-trust is one of the most eroded things I see in the people I work with. Not because they're weak or incapable. Because their nervous system never learned to feel safe with its own judgement.
So they look outside themselves. To me. To their partner. To their business partner. To anyone who might give them permission to do the thing they already know they need to do.

And every time they outsource the decision — the self-trust erodes a little more.

Here's the thing: self-trust is not a personality trait. It's not something you either have or you don't.

It's built. Decision by decision. Action by action. Through the accumulation of evidence that you can handle what life brings.
Even when you get it wrong.
Especially when you get it wrong.

If this is landing for you — I'm running a free one-hour masterclass on Monday 10th August at 6.30pm.

Why Your Brain Works the Way It Does.

Link in bio to register.

What decision are you avoiding making for yourself right now?

Drop it in the comments.

25/07/2026

Do you wake up already overwhelmed?

Brain jumping between six things before 9am. Can't finish one. Exhausted by the afternoon in a way that makes no sense. Wired at night when you should be winding down.

You've probably tried to fix it. Nothing has touched the root of it.
Because the root isn't your habits. It isn't your willpower.

It's your nervous system.

I'm running a free one-hour masterclass on Monday 10th August at 6.30pm — Why Your Brain Works the Way It Does.

No diagnosis needed. No clinical language. Just one honest hour that could change how you see yourself.

Link in bio to register.

It's free. 👆

23/07/2026

The opportunity didn't arrive because I was busy. It arrived because I was present.

This week I started deliberately slowing down.
Not taking a holiday. Not switching off for a weekend. Deliberately creating stillness in the middle of one of the most uncertain periods of my business.

New programme I'm building. No sales yet. A level 3 accreditation I'm writing. No blueprint for what any of it looks like on the other side.
And in the middle of all of that uncertainty — I stopped running from it.

And a conversation arrived. An opportunity for collaboration. Someone who can see what I'm building and wants to be part of it.
I couldn't have manufactured that by being busier.
It arrived because I was regulated enough to receive it. Present enough to recognise it. Still enough to say yes.

Your nervous system is not your enemy. It's been protecting you. But it learned to protect you in a world that no longer exists.
And you can teach it something new.
Not by thinking your way there. By staying still long enough to let it update.

What might arrive in your life if you stopped filling every space?

Tell me below.
MensCoaching GrowthMindset

21/07/2026

I sat alone in my office this week with nothing to do. Here's what happened.

No phone. No task. No agenda. Just me.
Immediately — agitation. A restlessness in my body. My brain pulling me toward something productive, something useful, something that would justify being alive in that moment.
Because for most of my life, stillness has felt dangerous. Not peaceful. Dangerous.
Like if I stop moving, something is going to catch up with me.

But I stayed. I didn't get up. I let my nervous system do what it needed to do.
And gradually — it settled.

And what arrived on the other side of that agitation was something I can only describe as peace.

Not the absence of uncertainty. The uncertainty was still there — the programme I'm building, the sales that haven't come, the things I don't know how to do yet.

But underneath it — a knowing. That I'm actually okay. That what my brain predicts is always more threatening than what reality delivers.
The more I slow down — the more arrives. Not despite the stillness. Because of it.

When was the last time you sat with nothing and let yourself be okay?

Tell me below.

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