Clear Water Therapy

29/05/2026

We are relational creatures, we need safe and close connections with other people to be able to thrive.

It’s not that we simply need people around us, it’s that we need people around us that we can connect with on a deep level. Who feel safe to us. It’s only here that we find comfort.

Working on your relationship with yourself is fundamental but not inclusive to achieving this. Being able to understand your attachment needs and how you can work on building a secure sense of self allows you to open up, communicate and deepen your most significant connections.

People come to therapy for many reasons, however we will almost always complete some level of work on relational experiences. How clients learnt to relate within early experiences, how that manifests itself in current relationships and the overall sense of self.

Fundamentally our relational experiences sit at the core of it all.

You can find me at:

https://www.clearwatertherapy.uk/

https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/counsellors/gemma-karami

Or DM “therapy” to learn more.

28/05/2026

Today I came across a reflection I’d written myself a few years ago when I felt the full weight of something I was going through. It reminded me of the journey of change.

𝐻𝒶𝓅𝓅𝒾𝓃𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝒾𝓈 𝒻𝑜𝓊𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓃 𝓁𝑒𝓉𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝑔𝑜 𝑜𝒻 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝑒𝓍𝓅𝑒𝒸𝓉𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝑜𝒻 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓊𝑔𝒽𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓁𝒾𝒻𝑒 𝓌𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝒷𝑒 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝑒𝓂𝒷𝓇𝒶𝒸𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓁𝒾𝒻𝑒 𝒶𝓈 𝒾𝓉 𝒾𝓈.
𝒪𝓃𝓁𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓃 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓈𝑒𝑒 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝒾𝓉𝓈 𝓅𝑜𝓈𝓈𝒾𝒷𝒾𝓁𝒾𝓉𝒾𝑒𝓈.

I’ve explored the weight of expectation here before, it’s not new. It’s easy to recognise that expectation leads to comparison, discontentment and sadness.

The sense that your life should be something else leaves no space for you to recognise the gifts that you do have.

I realise that happiness is often found in letting go of the expectation and embracing the reality of the now. I believe that only then will you see all of its possibilities.

Once you let go of the expectation of what you should be, should have, should feel you make room for opportunity. You open yourself to gratitude and happiness in other ways and release disappointment and the often aching sense of loss that you otherwise may have clung to. It’s the holding on that’s keeping you stuck.

However I also realise that this is something that you will often have to remind yourself of. We will all experience the weight of change more than once. Sometimes it will be welcomed or expected and other times it will not. Life isn’t and will never be linear.

It’s ok to have times of feeling discomfort, to experience a range of emotion, the sensation of your experiences.

By noticing where you feel discomfort in your body you can move through the experience, you can perhaps name your experience as loss, grief, disappointment, hurt, sadness or anything else that may be relevant. And in the act of doing so you allow this to move through you.

This is how you let go, and the reward is space. Space for something else, something more positive, more beautiful and more aligned to your own values, needs and wants.

It’s not that you’re not deserving of the grand expectations you put on yourself or your life. You are deserving of anything you dream of.

The power of reality lies in your hands alone.

If you spend too long mourning your losses you leave yourself no space to see or energy to engage in the other opportunities life offers you.

The way to let go is to feel into the discomfort, to allow yourself to name and move through the pain.

Remember it is this that creates space for something better.

25/05/2026

How does Clear Water Therapy speak to you?

I once heard a quote and fell in love with an idea. The dream of sung to me, but why?

Imagine for a moment that your standing in crystal clear water, it’s peaceful all around and the warm sunshine is on your face. You look down at the glistening surface of the calm water, your feet beneath you can be seen easily, perhaps there are small fish near by, a shell or a water plant, you can see it, you know what it is and therefore you know you are safe.

Now imagine muddy water, turbulent water. Your not able to see what’s going on beneath the surface and you can’t see you feet anymore. You feel something brush against you and you jump, perhaps lifting your feet out of the water, maybe you panic a little.

Why did you do this?

Your mind isn’t clear about what’s going on or if your in danger or not. It reacts by sending strong signals to your body and making you behave in a particular way. The part of you in control of this reaction is trying to keep you safe without understanding the facts.

The only difference in the two stories is the water, clear water that’s calm and comforting.

When you see clearly your unconscious mind doesn’t scare easily allowing you to enjoying the moment for what it truly is.

That’s what I created Clear Water Therapy to bring you. Empowering your unconscious mind, providing clarity to your thoughts and allowing you to enjoy the lapping water and the warm sunshine in the peaceful quiet of your own mind.

It’s in this story that name was born ❤️ why not dip your toes into the water when you next get the chance and allow your mind to come back to this story.

24/05/2026

23/05/2026

Not all thoughts need your attention.
Let it go.

And name that song....

21/05/2026

I wrote this post on this day in 2020. Today it popped up on my memories and I was reminded of how much I’ve continued to grow into a more authentic version of myself over the past 6 years.

It’s a long one… bare with me...

At that time I felt so inspired by how hard I’d worked on myself, the discoveries I’d made along the way and all the possibilities that lay ahead.

I had no way of knowing the struggles the future would bring but I’d learned many tools to help me manage.

As it turned out I’d face things I never would have anticipated, the landscape of life changed in many more ways than I could have imagined. The highs and lows, twists and turns of it all weren’t easy. I have lost people I thought would be with me for a lifetime along the way and yet I'm still here doing so much more than surviving - I am living.

Looking back I see how every part of the journey helped me to grow, even when it was uncomfortable, even when it was sad. With every experience I evolved even more and every day I become more authentically myself. I love that. And I love the possibilities that come with not knowing where your path may lead.

I'd forgotten all about this moment and this post. Yet there have been two separate ocassions these past weeks when I have been reminded of what it felt to be in that place all those years ago, and that indeed not all victories feel victorious. Sometimes the biggest win is to accept and let go.

👇👇👇👇👇

Today marks a special day for me. It’s the day I realised victory doesn’t always feel victorious yet it can still be celebrated as the stepping stone for success.

This is me, a piece of my story...

There was once a moment where I thought I had the dream, it was a fleeting moment of pure joy as I sat in my car alone. Like many things in life, this was to be a reminder that all emotions are temporary and life undoubtably changes. Piece by piece all I thought to be my dream began to crack until slowly it became undone. Eventually as time moved on the world as I had once known it had changed so much that it felt as though it had completely fallen apart. What I hadn't realised yet was that this dream was never mine. It was sold to me, by society, by the community around me, by leaders and people I thought I "should" look up to and respect.

I remember this time when I finally said out loud that I felt like I was standing amidst a disaster, I described the way I felt was as if the walls of my life had fallen around me, the remains of rubble pilled high, it was dark, I was sad and I had no way out. I felt trapped, isolated and completely defeated.
The sadness I felt at this time was immense and often manifested itself as anger. I thought all the dreams and hopes I had for my life had gone and still life kept throwing more heartache at me, one thing after another piling that rubble even higher.

Then one day I noticed a crack in the debris, flowers began to grow where there had been nothing. I realised that the sun was still shining and through gaps in the heavy sky new hope began to be born, this hope was within me. I found guides were being brought into my life, giving me new perspective and for the first time in as long as I could remember I began to see myself again. My soul spoke to me and reminded me of who I once was.

I seen a quote that read “when things seem like they are falling apart, perhaps they are really falling into place” this quote found me when I needed it the most, I began to realise this was often the case and that in every part of our journey we have something to learn that will undoubtedly align us closer to our purpose.
This outlook gave a very different landscape, my disaster zone now looked like new opportunity. It was a chance to take all the rubble of the past and turn it into the building blocks of the future. It was a chance for me to create something new, wonderful and more beautiful than before.

I began to appreciate that without the heartache I never would have seen the light, this was the chance to create a more peaceful and fulfilling life that was more authentic to who I really am. In this life I could begin to celebrate the lessons life had given me and use them to help others.

So today the 21st of May 2020 marks a very important day on this journey, it feels like the war is finally over and the rebuild is well underway.

I know now that even in our darkest moments, when the burden of things become too heavy to carry, like the sky, we can let go, release the weight of the rain and the storm that’s been stuck inside of us and allow the sun to shine again. I realise that darkness and light live within us all and after the darkness the light will inevitably follow, even when you think it wont.

Today has reminded me to believe in myself, it’s told me I am resilient, there is always hope and my heartache was worth the small victory. I have the chance to live a life that matters, to be a bigger and brighter light than I ever would have been before and that the time to do that is now.

I’m not naive to think there won’t be times of darkness in my future, there is no doubt that I will experience sadness again but I know I am strong and I am a fighter. I recognise the love and the passion within me and I know I can survive and grow.

I know who I am. Parts of me can die, for I can be reborn and flourish again. The light that burns in us all can’t be extinguished by anyone other than ourselves. We hold the light and the power within us, sometimes we just need some help to find it again.

I wish for you strength and resilience in your dark times, to know that you are not alone in your suffering. I hope that when these times come you will find the courage within to see the opportunity. I hope that the light within you all will glow so brightly that you will begin your next chapter with love and gratitude in your heart, letting go of everything else.

Today I am winning, it’s time to release old ghosts.

If your still with me thank you for reading, I hope my story might resonate and even inspire you.

Love Gemma x

19/05/2026

What can feel like destruction can often be devine reconstruction. The trend of 'let them' represents an acceptance of what you can not control.

The theory of the red door; lost relationships, future dreams, career ambitions. A life you once thought was meant for you closed.

Sometimes you hold on, push the door, try to understand, re-run conversations, events. In attempts to find neat resolutions, closure. Or you keep pushing against a door that will never reopen trying to fight a way back to something that wasn't meant to be. You hold on to your suffering.

Eventually when you let go the yellow door appears; a life that was waiting, one you never imagined and would never have found on your own.

There is no need for regret, revenge isn’t necessary. There is no desire for approval anymore because you love the person you became in the process and found safety in the life that was meant for you.

You don't have to explain your growth to people who never understood your struggle.

You trust.

Because what once felt like destruction made way for divine reconstruction.

For the yellow door to appear, you only have to make space.

This beautiful clip captured by my yellow door. He catches me when I fall, knows me when I don't know who I am and reminds me everyday how unpredictable our lives can be 💛.

17/05/2026

When I hear someone's worst story for the first time my instinct isn't judgment, I don't think they are bad or terrible, I'm not shocked.

I think wow this is incredible, because what's happening right now is the discomfort of transition. We are shining the light, bringing the stories out from the shadows, and in that single moment transformation begins.

Much of the work I do with clients is relational. Our earliest experiences shape our current relationships and behavioural patterns. The way we interact and engage in vulnerability and closeness deriving from our formative years.

If the way we relate to ourself or others isn’t how we want it to be, if it’s causing us problems with our sense of self or within our relationships we can cultivate change by getting curious of our unhelpful patterns.

As humans we are very good at denying our dissatisfaction. We tell ourself ‘it’s ok’ and we accept what isn’t meeting our needs. We learned to do this to protect ourself but in doing so we are lying to ourself about our reality.

Often we will keep doing this until one day, suddenly, we realise this isn’t ok - something needs to change.

Sometimes it’s in this space that we take steps to make changes. We begin to challenge what we accept, we get curious about our barriers and our boundaries and somewhere on that journey we realise what we cannot change and where our power truly lies, inward.

I feel honoured to be trusted by my clients, grateful of the safety within the space we create and lucky to watch each of them grow, adapt and create more fulfilling experiences.

The experience of therapy is both transformative and freeing. No one thing can define you, you are layered and complex and beautiful.

17/05/2026

I am…
How do you complete that sentence?

We often finish it with emotion, empowering our emotion to define us. I am stressed, I am overwhelmed, I am fed up, I am exhausted, I am anxious, I am depressed, I am alone...

Whatever word we use after that little phrase begins to define us.

Unconsciously we invite more of that into our life, our neurones fire up, putting on a filter so that we notice more of what we believe. We attune to that frequency and our energy emits and attracts more of the same.

The truth is much like your thoughts, you are not your emotions. They do not define you.

Allow them to flow, acknowledge their messages but reframe them with the correct language ~ “I feel…”

Savour your defining “I am…” for the empowering language it deserves. If you wouldn’t say what follows about a friend don’t say it about yourself.

Here are some mantras to get you started, remember what follows “I am” is bound to come to fruition

I am powerful
I am strong
I am resilient
I am good
I am able
I am loving
I am talented
I am lucky
I am deserving
I am grateful
I am beautiful
I am enough
I am unique
I am gifted
I am abundant
I am imperfect
I am human

Leave your favourite “I am…” in the comments, even if you don’t quite believe it yet! 🙌🏼

Practice writing it, sharing it, saying it internally and out loud. And when you experience emotion remember to reframe your expression; “I feel” not “I am”