09/09/2026
We often hear about self-regulation, but children (and dysregulated adults) cannot self-regulate until they have experienced thousands of hours of co-regulation.
Co-regulation means using your calm, steady nervous system to anchor someone else's storm. A dysregulated brain cannot meet another dysregulated brain and find peace.
How to offer co-regulation today:
- Lower your voice and slow your speech.
- Soften your body language (sit on the floor rather than standing over them).
- Breathe slowly and noticeably: let them unconsciously match your rhythm.
You don't need the perfect words. Your calm presence is the medicine. ⚓