Therapy with Janine

01/06/2026

Today, I’ve been working with clients on the difference between reacting versus responding.

They may seem the same on the surface, but they are in fact very different.

Reacting is what we do in the moment when we are triggered.

It’s raw - it can be explosive - and it usually reveals our wounds and the unhealed parts of ourselves. It often leaves us feeling awful afterwards as we spout things in the moment that we later regret. We then get wrapped up in shame and embarrassment and it leave us feeling terrible about ourselves. 🥺

Sometimes we react not as our adult self, but something has awoken our wounded inner child, or our inner teen perhaps and we react from a place of hurt, embarrassment or shame.

The good news is…there is a better way. 😀

Responding is an entirely different thing.

When we respond, it comes from a very different place within us.

Responding is calmer, more rational, and often based on logic.

It does not mean those old wounds haven’t been touched - the difference is that we have taken some time to let the dust settle, and for that raw emotion to dissipate before we open our mouths.

We give ourselves time to feel. We give ourselves time to reflect. To sit with whatever is revealed to us and to show us where the pain still is. To use it point the way to what still needs to be healed within us.

And then we get to CHOOSE.

I could go back to the other person and unleash all my anger and frustration on them, or I could sit with these feelings - ask myself what’s behind them, and work through them.

I could ask myself ‘Is this a me problem, or a them problem?’

Then I could respond with a much clearer head, or maybe I don’t respond at all!

Choosing not to respond is still a response. But the difference is, you are more in control and operating from a place of empowerment rather than raw emotion.

So next time someone pushes your buttons, try ‘Practicing The Pause’, take a moment to sit with your feelings, take some deep breaths, pace around the garden if you need to and then choose your response.

That’s where your power lies.

29/05/2026

Sometimes people ask me what clients come to see me about.

Honestly this is a hard question to answer as there is no one typical thing.

There are sometimes themes that emerge, and I’ve learned a lot by doing this job about us humans and how we struggle — plus all the ways we try to avoid our own pain.

I’ve learned that often it’s not the thing we appear to be struggling with that’s the problem — it’s how we think about that thing, and the meaning we give to it.

Much of my work is about helping people to let go of what they can’t control — to find acceptance — and to recognise their choices.

When you’re going through a period of struggle, ask yourself what you can control. Usually the answer is simple — really only ourselves. We can’t make other people change.

We get to control our responses, how we look at things and what we hold on to.

A good question to ask ourselves is how am I contributing to or keeping myself in the struggle?

What would happen if I just let it go?

Being self-reflective often holds a lot of answers and can bring everything into focus.

26/05/2026

It’s a warm one in the office today!! 😎

The big fan is on. 🥵

⚠️Just a heads up for anyone who is taking antidepressant medication (SSRI’s)⚠️

If you’re on this medication, extreme heat can cause or worsen heat sensitivity.

SSRI’s can:

🥵 Affect the hypothalamus which is responsible for regulating body temperature

🥵 Alter normal sweat gland function

🥵 Mask your body’s natural thirst cues

Make sure you:

🚰 Drink water and other electrolyte-rich drinks throughout the day - before you feel thirsty

🪭 Use fans to keep cool

🏠 Stay inside in the cool and limit exposure to the sun between 11am and 4pm

👙wear light, breathable, loose-fitting clothing where possible

Enjoy this glorious weather, but stay safe!! 😊☀️😊

15/05/2026

Most people don’t really know what to expect when they first come to see me.

Often they’ve been holding a lot in, and trying to carry on - but at some point they’ve realised that they don’t have to struggle alone.

There is no formula for healing.

It takes time.

It takes empathy and compassion.

It takes honesty and courage to face the things that we might have tried really hard to push down.

The first step to healing is to stop pretending you’re ok when you’re not. Healing begins when you allow your feelings to exist and you stop hiding the pain from yourself.

What I can promise as your therapist:

💗 I will show up as my full authentic self. I will hold the space for you to do the same, and if that’s hard, we will explore this together.

💗 I will listen with empathy and compassion - not just to what you say - but to what you don’t.

💗 I will meet you right where you are. There is no need for you to be anything other than you. No expectations. No pressure.

💗 I will not judge - judgement is a barrier to empathy. I cannot empathise fully if I’m sitting in judgment. I am not a perfect human being!! (Very well aware of my flaws thank you!! 😁)

💗 I will gently challenge you. I will encourage you to be open to new perspectives. I will not collude with you and tell you everything you want to hear. I will be honest and I might even tell you things that are hard to hear. But we will work through this together.

💗 I will be with you in your pain. As you allow yourself to lean in to your feelings, I’ll be walking right beside you supporting you all the way and helping you to make sense of it all.

If you’ve been thinking about therapy but have talked yourself out it, why not have a chat with me to see if it might help.

Email me:

[email protected]

I’m here ready to support you whenever you’re ready.

Daytime and early evening appointments plus limited weekend availability. Get in touch for more details.

(Pic of my dog Ziggy, cos he’s cute! 🐾)

Ziggy says you should do it! 😁

29/04/2026

Have you been told that you have anxiety?

Or do you or others describe you as a worrier? 🤔💭

Anxiety is a normal part of life, but for some, it can spiral out of control and affect our lives and our health in negative ways.

There are many factors that may be playing a part in the anxiety we feel. Below are just some but there will be many more:

➡️ Past traumas
➡️ A nervous system stuck in ‘fight-flight’
➡️ Health issues
➡️ Supporting someone else with health issues
➡️ Unemployment
➡️ The use of drugs or alcohol/addiction
➡️ Too much coffee
➡️ Bad sleep hygiene
➡️ Stress at work
➡️ Difficult family relationships
➡️ Feeling like we can’t be fully ourselves
➡️ Feeling stuck in playing a role
➡️ Being in a toxic relationship
➡️ Supporting someone with addiction issues
➡️ Having children with SEN
➡️ Finances
➡️ Fluctuating hormones and monthly cycles
➡️ Diagnosed or undiagnosed Neurodivergence

And then there’s the ever-changing world we live in and the constant stream of bad news. 🤯😵‍💫

I see anxiety as a reaction to something, and usually it stems from feeling out of control which is why when I work with anxiety in therapy, my approach is to help people explore it and find out what the root cause is, rather than just treat the symptoms. A big part of alleviating anxiety, is understanding what’s causing it.

I help my clients to recognise that often they are having a very normal reaction to the circumstances they find themselves in. They just need help to turn the alarm down. 🚨

I also hold the belief that sometimes there is wisdom in anxiety - on a deep level, our bodies know when things don’t feel right and if we are willing to get really curious, sometimes we discover that our anxiety was telling us that something in our life isn’t working anymore and things need to change. The problem is that most of us ignore the signs. 🚧⛔️⚠️❌

As part of my initial assessment with new clients, I always ask if they have been diagnosed with any mental health conditions. The reason I ask this is to find out what they’ve been told about themselves by other professionals such as the GP and to get an idea of how they might be viewing themselves.

For example if someone has been officially diagnosed with anxiety, it makes me curious as to how this label might be shaping their behaviour and experiences.

Diagnoses can be helpful for lots of people as it gives a name to their experience, but the downside is that often this label becomes a full stop which means that the label then limits their life.

Have you ever said - “I could never ______(fill in the blank), my anxiety wouldn’t let me!!”

Sometimes we can unknowingly let the label limit us and we give up trying to work through our issues. Often it becomes part of our very identity.

Which is why my core approach to therapy is humanistic and holistic, meaning I see the person, not just the labels.

Labels don’t ever encapsulate a person’s life experiences. They may give a name to certain struggles but therapy is about increasing capacity and encouraging personal growth, and helping people to meet themselves fully with an acceptance of where they are at.

You are not your anxiety and with support, things can improve. 💗

24/04/2026

Friday afternoon and the sun is shining!! ☀️☀️☀️☀️

It’s such a mood booster isn’t it!? 🕶️

I’m sitting here with my cabin doors open wide while
I type up client notes.

I was talking to a client earlier about noticing the glimmers ✨We are programmed for noticing the negatives in life and we often don’t notice the positives!!

So today I’m noticing how nice the sun feels on my face, I’m loving hearing the birds chirping and I’m thankful for another week of supporting my lovely clients on their journeys.

What are you grateful for today? 💗

18/04/2026

This !!👇🏼

If we can stop apologising for the things we have been led to believe we need to, we will start to free others to do the same. Free yourself and be kind to yourself and you are naturally doing the same for another. 🧡

18/04/2026

If you’ve been thinking about starting therapy, feel free to get in touch. I have a couple of spaces just opened up.

I know it can feel a bit daunting reaching out and knowing what to say, which is why I do a free phone consultation with all new clients so that I can introduce myself properly and I can tell you a bit about my approach to therapy and run through the details.

You get to hear my voice and decide if I would be someone you feel you can work with. It’s a great opportunity to ask questions too.

I aim to make the process as easy as possible for you, putting you at ease right from the start.

If you’ve been struggling for a while and want to share the load, send me a message. You don’t have to carry it alone. I’m here and ready to support you. 💗

You can reach me by email:

[email protected]

15/04/2026

I wanted to do a little post re-introducing myself for any new followers on my page, and also because there has been a bit of a shift in terms of the clients I support in my private therapy practice. So here I go…😀

I’m Janine - mum of two beautiful girls (both far too grown up for my liking), therapist, dog mum, animal lover, vegan, ex-teacher, tea drinker, hummus addict, nature lover, music enthusiast, gig goer, currently revelling in my 90’s grunge revival era. 🤘🏼🎸

I love art, music, theatre, cinema and philosophy. I enjoy a good mooch around the markets - Camden being a favourite hang out of mine. Handmade jewellery is my kryptonite! I own more rings than I have fingers!! 😆🙈💍

Almost 10 years ago, I had some counselling to help me navigate my divorce and it made such an impact on me that I embarked upon a career change at the ripe old age of 41 and re-trained as a counsellor.

This was the start of a really surprising journey for me - and what was a huge crisis and very turbulent time in my life turned out to be the beginnings of a beautiful blessing in disguise. (I can only say this now of course with the benefit of hindsight and therapy.)

Since qualifying, I have worked with a wide range of people; men, women, young adults and children. People from the LGBTQ community, religious people, non-religious people, trainee counsellors, survivors of abuse, unpaid carers - and I’ve supported a lot of vegans along the way too. 🌱

I never really wanted to settle into a niche as a therapist, as I wanted to be able to support everyone and thought that if I developed a specialism, that I would be excluding people that might need my help. And it’s been great as I’ve learned so much from all of my clients over the years.

However, as amazing as the last 5 years or so have been in terms of the wonderful clients I’ve been able to support, I’ve realised that maybe it’s ok to not be the right therapist for everyone. After all, you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea - and that’s okay!!

Where I live in Rayleigh, there are a host of other amazing counsellors and therapists and I know that if I am not able to support someone for whatever reason, that there is likely another therapist close by that can! I’m always happy to help with onward referrals wherever I can.

So a few weeks back I made the decision to follow my heart and go where the learning takes me. And where it has led me, is to the decision from this point forwards that I want to work exclusively with women. 💗

As much as I love working with men, I ADORE working with women.

I feel really passionate about supporting women in all stages of life and empowering them to fully meet themselves JUST AS THEY ARE.

Whether you are young woman just starting out, figuring out what you want in life, or a mum juggling family, work and other commitments, someone with a career or lots of responsibility or a mid-life lady struggling to keep it all together - I can totally relate, I’m part of the peri-merry club myself 😉 (Thanks to my client for teaching me this fab phrase!)

Women’s lives are rich and complex and often many of my clients come to me when they are experiencing burn out from carrying so much. They have been the glue holding everything together for everyone else for a long time and they reach a point where this is unsustainable. They realise that they need support and a safe space to put the load down and share with someone who gets it.

So, if you are a woman looking for support, or you know someone that is, send me DM or an email and I will arrange a free call with you to discuss how I can help.

Edited to add: I work face to face and online for those further afield. 😊

Thanks for reading what turned out to be quite an essay!!

Janine 💖

💻 www.therapywithjanine.co.uk

📧 [email protected]

(Picture of me on a recent weekend away in Cambridge.)

05/04/2026

Wishing you all a very Happy Easter 💐🐰