16/06/2026
Something we talk a lot about in equine facilitated therapy is how horses respond to us, our energy, our emotions, whatâs really going on beneath the surface.
But something just as important⌠is this:
Horses are sentient beings.
They have their own needs, preferences, and feelings and sometimes, they simply donât feel like engaging.
And thatâs more than okay.
In fact, itâs essential that horses are allowed to say no.
Because in a world where many people have felt unable to say no themselves⌠this can be incredibly powerful to witness.
Itâs also important that we allow horses to be horses⌠not humans in horse bodies.
When we place human thoughts, intentions, or judgements onto them, we can miss whatâs actually happening in front of us.
And thatâs exactly why part of my work also includes teaching horse behaviour and body language.
Because the more we understand what horses are actually communicating through subtle shifts, posture, movement, and presence, the less we rely on assumptions, and the more we can meet them with clarity, respect, and curiosity.
There are moments in sessions where a horse might choose not to approach, not to interact, or to stay focused on something else entirely. And whatâs really interesting is what happens nextâŚ
Because for some people, that can feel personal.
Like rejection.
Like theyâve done something wrong.
Like theyâre not liked.
And thatâs where the real insight begins.
How often do we carry those same thoughts into our everyday lives?
Here with the herd, we see it so clearly.
Archie, for example, loves his grass. Sometimes heâll simply continue grazing, completely content, not engaging in the way someone might expect. Whereas Smartie and Brandy are often more curious, approaching and interacting with clients.
It can be easy to tell ourselves a story:
âArchie doesnât like me⌠but the others do.â
But the truth is much simpler.
Archie is just meeting his own needs and wants in that moment.
And that opens up a really important reflection:
How often do we assume someone elseâs behaviour is about us⌠when actually, it has nothing to do with us at all?
And how do we respond when something or someone says no to us?
These moments can gently highlight the narratives we hold about ourselves, the old wounds, familiar patterns, the meaning we make when connection doesnât happen in the way we expect.
But they can also offer something else:
A chance to explore boundaries.
A chance to experience that ânoâ doesnât equal rejection.
A chance to reconnect with our own needs, too.
And within that awareness, there is space for something new.
A different understanding.
A little more compassion.
For ourselves, and for others.
Because sometimes⌠itâs not rejection.
Itâs just a horse enjoying his grass đż
⨠Iâd love to hear your thoughts and whether you ever caught yourself taking something personally, only to realise later it wasnât about you at all?
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