08/05/2026
Today is my brother Davids anniversary.
32 years .... another lifetime yet still feels like yesterday.
On the camino almost 10 years ago I found peace.
It took a long time so when I found this sign on the camino when with a group a few weeks ago it made me giggle.
I used to think Id never 'stop crying'
I have been on a journey almost 20 years now learning to heal my life & live with grief.
I wrote this poem 2 years ago (one of many) & I hope it helps you take a step towards seeking what you need to live life again while navagating your loss.
I hadnt written a title however 'Stop Crying' feels appropriate.
The tears I thought Id cried them all, yet here I sit & feel them fall
Gently flowing from my eyes, touching my cheeks & landing on my thighs.
Grief, I hear you, I see you, I feel you still,
I wonder if I always will.
The anger, the rage it does subside,
Now im questioning how I feel deep inside.
Once lost, feeling alone in the deepest depths of grief,
I have searched long & hard to feel some relief.
Once pushed down & blocked out with stuff,
The shopping,
The alcohol,
The controlling situations,
The food,
Eventually I cracked I'd had enough!
Enough of the numbing,
Enough trying to hide,
The pain in my heart took so long to subside.
It comes like waves when I least expect it, I dont dwell there no more, Ive learned to accept it.
There are good days & bad, now I know thats the way,
I start each morning knowing "this too shall pass", I can choose a different way.
I have found peace using my daily practices.
Meditation, yoga, writing too, looking for gratitude in all that I do.
It started very slowly & I resisted far too long.
However each step I took I felt more strong.
Just one step at a time, taken day by day,
Im living a life im happy to be in, I think im finding my way.
Barbara Byrne - May 2024
