05/09/2021
I’M MARRIED BUT I CANNOT TALK, I DARE NOT
**If you are a husband, lucky to be reading this because someone else has shared it, please don’t make assumptions, call your wife and discuss this with her.
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“Why don’t you speak with your husband about it?” she stared at her feet and slowly, with sacred, confused eyes said “don’t worry sir, I will find another way”.
This is the story of so many women, who today, are caught in scary marital webs.
The place of conversation is very important in a home but such is the amount of fear and intimidation that many have experienced (and still experience) that they would rather continue to face their nightmares than dare to speak up, even when it is just to bring his notice to it.
S*x is poor but it cannot be a coincidence that many wives are claiming to be afraid to speak up because the little they have said, has been made out to mean that they are wayward to even know.
You have an idea but you dare not talk about it, let alone contribute to his ideas. Everything said is foolish and low and daft – at least that’s how it is treated.
Food gets burnt? You are in different shades of trouble, some of which, can include getting beaten as you told what your parents are.
When you go out, you better not forget to give full details of where you are going to and to be back within the hour (I promise you, some cannot leave the home). Don’t let that deceive you into thinking you have a right to query where his whereabouts even when they flag.
You want to take a job but you have to spend days being scared of what would be said.
You want to develop yourself with further education or skill acquisition, for what now?
For the love of all that’s good, what are making marriage into?
You want to involve who? Family? You dare not. How do you even involve family when they take you for a ride and feed off his disrespect for you?
What’s most puzzling is how much of this happens in homes where religion is heavy, homes where age gap is very wide or homes where the husband’s income is low or has stopped.
Don’t worry, I am not in your home and I am not your secret neighbour. It sounds familiar because this is a very big trend that we all pretend about.
I know you want to share this, don’t worry, I understand that you dare not.
**For the rest of us who are luckier than we know, to be able to share, please help your friends who dare not, and the ones who are not allowed on social media (I promise you, this happens more than you imagine)
Your post may be the reason, their homes get better. Let's raise the awareness on this so that people can know that marriage is not a concentration camp and being a spouse should not mean being a tyrant.
