The Inside-Out Way

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The Inside-Out Way is a three-step process that has helped me and hundreds of others to move from self-doubt, shame and imposter syndrome to joy, confidence, belonging, ease and authenticity.

19/10/2026

“The s**t doesn’t seem so s**t when you’ve got things to look forward to!”

A little gem of wisdom my brother came up with quite some time ago now!

I often share it with people I’m walking alongside through coaching.

Sometimes they write it down, but more often there’s simply a lot of nodding as they recognise just how much truth there is in those words!

Because having something to look forward to really can make a difference to how we experience life, especially when things are feeling a bit tough.

And the wonderful thing is, it may be something big, but it doesn’t have to be a massive adventure, an overseas holiday or tickets to a big concert.

It might be a catch-up with a friend, a potluck dinner, a picnic, a walk somewhere new, a movie night, a Sunday drive, trying a new café or simply setting aside some time to do something you love.

Something that puts a little sparkle in the diary!

And whether it is those times when we can’t see much further than the moment we’re in, and getting through the day really is a case of step by step, looking a little further ahead can be one of those steps to get something booked in…

Or maybe life isn’t s**t, but you’re up for a bit of a shake up and that feeling of counting down the sleeps!

Joy doesn’t have to wait until the event arrives. Joy can be found in the anticipation too!

In the planning, the imagining, the excitement, the countdown, the little moments of looking forward.

And that’s something I love exploring with people in my coaching. Not just what’s getting in the way of someone enjoying their life, but what they want to be moving towards!

What lights them up. What they’d love more of. What would give them something to look forward to, something to get excited about, wake those butterflies up!

Sometimes the next step towards a life that feels more alive is a big courageous decision and sometimes it’s simply putting something lovely in the diary.

So, what are you looking look forward to? And if this has got you a bit stumped… what would you like it to be!

18/10/2026

How to protect your joy in three steps!

Today I decided it was time for summer toes!

I’d picked out what I thought was a very pink pink, but as the first toe was painted, I realised it was actually a very red red!

An older version of me would have probably just gone along with it. Not wanting to make a fuss, inconvenience anyone or ask for something different.

And yes, I would have felt a little tinge of disappointment every time I looked at my toes!

But something I’ve come to realise in more recent years is that sometimes our joy needs protecting.

Especially when we may be so used to saying yes, going along with things or putting what other people might think, or feel, ahead of what we actually want.

So I spoke up!

I explained that it wasn’t quite the colour I’d hoped for and asked if we could find something a little pinker.

And there it was on the stand next to us - a pink pink!

As I sat there having the rest of my toes painted, I got thinking about three things that can help us protect our joy.

1. Know what brings you joy.

Red doesn’t particularly bring me joy. Pink absolutely does!

And while today it was just about nail polish, on a bigger scale it’s about knowing ourselves. Our values, our preferences, our beliefs, what matters to us and what makes us feel alive.

2. Speak up for your joy.

It’s all well and good knowing what we want, but sometimes it takes that extra bit of courage to actually say it.

Not just speaking up about what we don’t want, but being able to express and be specific about what we DO want. (It wasn’t just any old pink!)

3. Give yourself permission to choose it.

To take up space. To do things differently. To let go of the people-pleasing and the worry about what others might think.

To recognise that what brings us joy absolutely matters too.

Sometimes protecting our joy doesn’t require a great big life-changing decision.

Sometimes it’s simply having the courage to say, “Actually, could I have the pink one, please?”

“Actually, I don’t want that, I would like this instead.”

Where in your life could you do with a little more of your version of pink pink and a little less red red! 💅

14/10/2026

I’m not a fan of positive thinking.

Well… that’s not entirely true.

I think what I’m not a fan of is the idea that some feelings are acceptable and others aren’t.

“Don’t worry, be happy.”
“Look on the bright side.”
“Good vibes only.”

There’s actually a cushion in the office that says “Good vibes only” and I have been known to turn it around because, quite frankly, all vibes are welcome!

What if I or someone else has got some other vibes going on?

Because sometimes life hurts. Sometimes we’re grieving, angry, frightened, disappointed or just having a really hard time.

And I don’t think the answer is always to think our way into feeling something different.

What I’m much more interested in is making room for **this AND that**.

Recently, I had some pretty hefty emotions come up. In the past, they would have had me reaching for a Jack. These days, I have to feel my way through the feelings.

And this time, rather than filling every available space so I didn’t have to feel them, I actually wanted the space to hear what they had to say.

I checked in with my body, heart, soul, mind and spirit.

I noticed what I needed.

And alongside everything I was feeling, I noticed the beauty around me. I felt grateful for what and who I had. I stayed open to what else was there.

The tough emotions **AND** the birdsong.

The tears **AND** the hands around a cup of tea.

Sadness **AND** gratitude.

Fear **AND** hope.

Grief **AND** joy.

Would “just think positive” have helped?

Not for me.

But remembering that life can hold more than one thing at once did.

That works for me.

Not pretending.
Not plastering a smile over something that hurts.
Not trying to think our way out of being human.

But being able to say:

**This is what I’m feeling right now AND I can still stay open to what else might be here.**

Follow ✨

08/10/2026

It’s My Party Day!

Find out more about October’s Joy Splash in the bio!🥳

01/10/2026

Someone said to me recently, “I’d love to connect next year.”

And then someone else in another conversation said, “Well… 2026 isn’t over yet.”

And honestly? That landed.

Because normally I’m winding the year down around now.

But we still have THREE months! A whole season of life.

This year has been a big one for me. A transitional one.

After years of focusing on healing, I’ve felt something shift…

Toward living, joy, adventure, community, belonging…

So I’m not ready to wrap this chapter up yet!

There are still people to meet.
Places to go.
Things to try.
Joy to notice.
Adventures to say yes to.

So my question is:

What would you love MORE of before 2026 is over?

More joy? More play? More connection? More courage? More you?

We still have a whole season.

What would you love it to hold for you?

Where is the joy?FULL OF THE JOYS is a 7-day online experience for the part of you that knows there’s more.More alivenes...
14/09/2026

Where is the joy?

FULL OF THE JOYS is a 7-day online experience for the part of you that knows there’s more.

More aliveness.
More peace.
More awe, wonder and magic.
More you.

This isn’t about forcing happiness, filling up the calendar and it’s certainly not faking it till you make it!!

It’s an invitation to reclaim your joy and be able to move through life from a more expansive and open place.

Inside these 7 days, we’ll create space to breathe, reconnect, reflect and explore what actually feels alive for you now.

Because sometimes joy doesn’t arrive through doing more.

Sometimes it comes when we pause long enough to notice.

This is for you if you’re ready to:
✨ feel more present in your life
✨ reconnect with your joy
✨ stop overriding what your body already knows
✨ create a beautiful reset moment for yourself
✨ remember that joy gets to be simple, spacious, and real…

Kicks off this Thursday. Link is in the bio.

I shared in this post two years ago that I had had a journal in my bones for ages… I smiled when I saw this memory pop u...
07/09/2026

I shared in this post two years ago that I had had a journal in my bones for ages…

I smiled when I saw this memory pop up tonight, because just a few hours earlier I had started creating Journal Number Two!

Excited much!

Watch this space! ✨

07/09/2026

I paused this morning...

The alarm had gone off and I’d left it until the last, last, last, last minute to get up and go for a 6:30am dip in the sea. And that was when I paused. I realised that only one person was down for the 7am dip, and decided to give myself some breathing space and accompany her instead.

I poured my cup of tea and pulled the covers back on the bed, and in that just-about-to-sit-down moment, stopped, paused again and took my cup of tea outside.

I sat outside with my cup of tea and asked, “Where is the joy in this moment?”

It wasn’t, what can I do to make myself feel happier? Not, how can I make today joyful? Just, where is the joy in this moment? Where is it already?

It was right there in front of me, hands around the cup of tea.

It was in the particular sound of rain on the canopy above that reminded me of camping holidays on the Isle of Mull, Scotland. 

It was in the fairy lights that were still holding their glow, however many hours later.

It was in the heart-shaped shell piece that Mum made me when Mum and Dad were here, ten years ago.

It was in the blue heart that my friend, a potter, made. It was in the blue frog ornament that I randomly found in the garden one day.

It was in the birdsong that seemed delighted that it was raining.

It was in the chalk rainbow that thankfully was created in the dry and brings colour on such a grey day.

I’ve been doing a practice for a wee while now of finding something that brings me joy every day. There’s always something, and I have loved seeing how different these things can be.

Most of the time it’s at the end of the day that I’ve taken a moment to reflect and find the gold.

Instead, today, I’m starting with the intention of choosing to be open to joy too.

Should our paths cross, it may not necessarily mean that I will have a super big smile on my face all day! That’s what I love about joy - it can be present whatever we’re navigating.

So today, it’s not about trying to make this day joyful. I’m simply keeping my eyes open for the joy that’s already there...

Link in bio for my seven day online experience - Full of the joys!

Would love you to jo

Joy! Probably one of my favourite emotions! So looking forward to this online event! Keen for more joy in your world, th...
03/09/2026

Joy!

Probably one of my favourite emotions!

So looking forward to this online event!

Keen for more joy in your world, then this could be just the ticket!

Link in the bio!

There are some sentences that I hear oftenOne of them is this - "I don't even know what I enjoy anymore."Some say it wit...
22/07/2026

There are some sentences that I hear often

One of them is this - "I don't even know what I enjoy anymore."

Some say it with an embarrassed laugh, others it's a new realisation, one that can feel pretty confronting. Sure sometimes it's about what they do for fun, Often they have spent years responding to everyone else's needs before their own, been busy just getting through the day-to-day that somewhere along the way they stopped noticing what made them come alive.

I've seen it happen so many times over the years, and I know it form my journey too. What we find is that curiosity and openness can be such a beautiful way to start remembering what energises them, feeling that spark again within, losing track of time, having opportunities lined up to look forward to. That's why I am so passionate about joy, not just because it is one of my favourite feelings, but because it can often be a pointer, a compass, back to ourselves.

That's exactly what the **Aliveness Experiment** is about. - Not creating a different life overnight.

Simply helping you reconnect with the parts of yourself that may have been waiting very patiently to be noticed again.

If you've found yourself saying, "I don't even know what I enjoy anymore," I'd love you to come and explore that with us.

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Brooklands, New Plymouth
New Plymouth
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