08/18/2026
🤔 If you've ever found yourself wondering, “Is this normal?” while raising a teenage daughter, this month's “What Are We Reading?” pick may be one to add to your list.
📚We're diving into Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions Into Adulthood by Lisa Damour, PhD.
✨ This book offers a different way of looking at some of the confusing, frustrating, and sometimes dramatic parts of adolescence—reframing them as meaningful developmental steps on the journey toward adulthood.
🔎 Rather than focusing only on how to manage difficult behaviors, the book invites parents to consider what their daughters may be learning, navigating, and becoming underneath them.
🔑 Here are the seven transitions the book explores:
🧸 1. Parting with Childhood:
Growing up means gradually moving away from childhood and beginning to develop a more independent sense of self.
👭 2. Joining a New Tribe:
Friendships and peer relationships become increasingly important as teens find their place and figure out where they belong.
🌊 3. Harnessing Emotions:
Adolescents experience big emotions while still learning how to understand, manage, and express them.
🧭 4. Contending with Adult Authority:
Part of growing up involves developing independence and learning how to navigate rules, limits, and the authority of adults.
🎓 5. Planning for the Future:
Teenagers begin thinking more seriously about who they are, what they want, and where they may be headed.
💗 6. Entering the Romantic World:
Developing romantic relationships introduces new experiences, emotions, vulnerabilities, and opportunities for learning.
🛡️ 7. Caring for Herself:
Growing toward adulthood also means learning to care for herself—including making decisions about her health, well-being, boundaries, and personal safety.
🤍 Callie chose this book as a mom of three, including two young women herself. She shared that one of the things she appreciated most was how it helped her step outside of her own feelings and experiences as a parent and refocus on what her daughters might actually be experiencing.
🧑🧒 Sometimes, parenting a teenager can feel deeply personal. This book offers a reminder that what feels difficult at home may also be part of something important happening within the child.
💭A few questions Callie has found herself coming back to:
✨ How will my daughter grow from the conflict she is experiencing right now?
✨ Is this really a hill I want to die on?
✨ Is asking a thoughtful question in a focused tone more helpful than giving a lecture right now?
🌱 Growing up can be messy— for teenagers and for the people raising them. Understanding the process can make a little more room for patience, curiosity, and connection.
