08/31/2026
Birth Story
Esther and Joel # 5
It has taken me some time to gather my thoughts on the delivery of Esther and Joel’s fifth child. I write it with transparency and humility. Only because I am what I am by the grace of God and midwives are human. This is all very hard for me to share. Yet this is birth and it is a story of love, forgiveness and the grace of God for this family and for me.
Going back to 2017, when I first met them as they were expecting their first son, Esther was generally easygoing, gentle, and kind. We meshed easily, as anyone would who knows her. They are a couple whose faith is genuine and authentic.
Fast forward nine years, four more children, and countless conversations. Esther has experienced some easier, FAST births and some challenging versions. Yet through all the ups and downs, they have remained steady in their faith and trusting in God.
Esther and I have now had at least 50 appointments together. It never ceases to amaze me how those regular visits bond a midwife and client together. We have come to know each other well over the years, as have Joel and I. There is a mutual respect between us. Joel knows that I care deeply about Esther, and his love for her and their family is strong.
Number five was born this summer. They decided not to find out whether they were having a boy or a girl. They already had four boys. Secretly, I thought it was a girl. Usually, I get this right. LOL.
Wendy and I were called to come to the birth around midnight. As we quickly made our way out to their rural home, we prayed and anticipated a quick delivery. I told Wendy as we pulled up, “The baby will be here very soon after we arrive, because that is Esther for you.”
When we walked in through the back door, I spotted her easily. She was in the kitchen, where one of her other babies had arrived prior to our arrival some years ago. She was standing in a flowy dress, leaning over the counter.
I placed my bag on the bar.
Joel said, “She is close.”
I grabbed gloves and my Doppler. Wendy quickly began preparing the supplies a few steps away in the nearby living room. I made my way to Esther’s side, laid my hand on her shoulder, and whispered, “I’m here. Good job, Esther.”
In the next moment, a lot happened.
Esther had been standing and laboring beautifully, and as I approached her I initially did not see anything that suggested she was actively pushing. I reached toward her with the Doppler, intending to listen to the baby.
But I couldn't get the Doppler where I needed it.
Something made me pause.
A thought came to me: Maybe she is pushing. Simultaneously Joel and I began to lift her dress.
What happened next unfolded in seconds.
Joel was standing behind her, and as we both realized what was happening, we reached to lift her dress at almost the exact same moment. The dress had completely obscured the baby's emergence from both of us.
And suddenly, the baby was born.
The baby landed on the floor, and because of the distance, the cord avulsed.
I remember how quickly everything changed—and how calm the room became for me internally. There was no time to process what had happened. There was only the next thing that needed to be done.
I knelt beside the baby. Wendy immediately handed me a towel, and I covered the baby while we dealt swiftly with the cord avulsion. We worked calmly and efficiently.
Esther appeared to be in shock.
Within minutes, we had her moved to the floor and the baby GIRL safely brought to her chest.
And there, in the middle of an incredibly unexpected and frightening birth, mother and baby were together.
The baby nursed. Vitals were reassuring. The baby girl appeared well. After discussing the situation, and having reassurance that the baby continued to nurse, maintained good vital signs, and appeared normal, transfer for further evaluation was not necessary. The family declined further evaluation.
Eventually, the room began to settle.
And something important happened in those first hours that I don't want to lose in telling this story:
Despite what had just happened, there was so much tenderness in that room. Esther and Joel were with their baby girl after so many boys. We had time to breathe. We watched their little one nurse and settle. We talked, cared for them, and began those quiet hours of getting to know this new baby. The postpartum period was sweet. We sat in their room like we always do to enjoy the new life and doing the things we always do.
And yet, underneath that beauty, the events of the birth sat heavily on all of us. Wendy and I replayed it all the way home. I could not let go of what I could have done differently.
I think sometimes people imagine that if a midwife remains calm during an emergency, she must not have been frightened.
But calm and unaffected are not the same thing.
I was calm because that is what the moment required of me.But I was deeply affected by what had happened.
The next day, when I returned to check on the family, Joel opened the conversation himself. I was never so thankful for a man to be so open, honest and able to communicate so well. He told me that he was not blaming us. He said he knew the baby was doing well, that he understood how traumatic the experience had been for all of us, and that they held no ill will.
In fact, he told me how thankful he was for how calmly and quickly I had handled the situation.
As we talked through the birth again from my perspective, something became clear to Esther that had not been clear to her in the aftermath.
The dress had hidden the baby's emergence.
Neither Joel nor I had been able to see what was happening until the moment the baby was already being born.
I could see relief come over Esther as she understood this. It all made sense to all of us now. We didn’t see what was happening and she didn’t know she needed to tell us. What in the world?
I think she had been trying to make sense of how something like this could have happened. I can imagine she may have felt I let her down. Now she and we had an explanation for something that had been so frightening and confusing only hours before.
And then Joel said something I will never forget:
“Even with all of this, you will always be our midwife.” Those words meant more to me than I can adequately express.
But our story was not finished.
Just when we thought it was time for them to settle into the ordinary beauty of those first newborn days, another unexpected event occurred.
The infant foot warmer malfunctioned, and the baby sustained a burn that required evaluation at the burn unit. The baby was treated and released.
I cannot adequately explain how deeply this affected me.
In more than 1,000 births, I had never experienced this before. I was devastated. I replayed it in my mind. I felt an enormous amount of guilt. As a midwife, you carry a tremendous responsibility for the families entrusted to your care, and this was something I never wanted for this family—or for any family.
And then, only days later, another phone call brought another frightening piece of news. The newborn screen came back positive for a serious disease. Once again, this family had to wait. Once again, we prayed.And once again, we had to trust God in a situation none of us could control.
Thankfully, the newborn screen ultimately proved to be a false positive.
Looking back on those days, it almost seems impossible that one little family could have been asked to walk through so many unexpected and frightening moments in such a short period of time.
But that isn't the part of this story that I want to remember most. I want to remember Esther and Joel choosing to trust, even when things did not go according to plan. I want to remember that beautiful postpartum time—the quiet moments with their new baby, the nursing, the tenderness, the ordinary things that felt extraordinary after such an intense birth.
And I want to remember what happened at our final appointment.
There were tears. There was comfort. There was healing of this baby’s little foot. There was thankfulness. There was relief.
There was a bond between this family and me that had somehow become even deeper through everything we had walked through together. Their faith and mine had carried us through days when there were more questions concerns than any of us liked. This was not the birth story any of us would have written. It was real life in a fallen world. A place where life isn’t perfect. Where bad things happen. A place where Jesus came to seek and save the lost. A place where He resides in our hearts and makes us new. He brings comfort, healing, grace and forgiveness.
Sometimes the deepest bonds are formed not when everything goes perfectly, but when we have the privilege of walking beside one another through the moments that leave us shaken, humbled, and completely dependent on grace.
I am incredibly thankful for Esther and Joel.
Thankful for their trust, forgiveness, and faithful example of Christ
And thankful that, through all of it, I am still their midwife and friend.
Delighted to Serve
Midwife Deidre and Wendy
