09/21/2026
**Some people see me where I am now and ask me why I work so hard.**
But then there are people who knew me before the degrees, before the license, before Urban Trauma Counseling Center... and before I even had the words to explain what I was going through.
**Look at the first picture.**
I was smiling.
My babies were with me.
We were on a week-long bus trip to Myrtle Beach. I had successfully paid all of the deposits and saved enough spending money for me and my girls to go on vacation.
I was PROUD.
**That was a good day.**
But what that picture doesn't show is everything that woman was carrying behind that smile.
I was a single mother with a high school diploma, working for the State of Maryland with a starting salary of about $23,000 a year.
I was living with untreated and undiagnosed PTSD, complicated grief, low self-esteem and the effects of domestic violence and trauma.
And I was raising two little girls.
I didn't have the clinical language to understand what was happening to me.
I just knew I had babies to raise and a life to build.
So I worked.
I went back to school.
I put my girls in Girl Scouts, swimming, ballet and private school when I could.
I took them on vacations.
I tried to expose them to things I hadn't been exposed to.
And I kept pushing.
**I thought I was just strong.**
Today, as a therapist, I can look back at that young woman with so much more understanding.
Some of what I called **resilience** was actually a **trauma response.**
I didn't wait for someone to save me because somewhere along the way, I had learned that I had to save myself.
I was determined to put as much distance as I possibly could between my children, myself and that feeling.
But here's another part of the story that matters.
The woman who invited us on that Myrtle Beach trip was someone I met at that State job.
She began including me and my children in her family's gatherings and outings. She helped expose my girls to activities, camps and experiences.
And wouldn't you know it...
I eventually met my husband.
**He was her cousin. 😂❤️**
And now we're family.
Thank you, Cecilia
I tell that part of the story because sometimes the place you think you're only going to earn a paycheck is the place where you're going to learn something, help someone — or meet someone who changes the trajectory of your life.
I experienced all three at that State job.
Now look at the second picture.
**That's still her.**
Same woman.
Different chapter.
The difference is that today, I have the education, clinical training and language to understand things that the younger woman in that first picture couldn't explain.
And I haven't forgotten her.
I haven't forgotten what it feels like to survive while still going to work.
To survive while raising children.
To survive while paying bills.
To survive while smiling.
To make sure everybody else is okay while privately trying to figure out how to become okay yourself.
**And THAT is why I created Women Rising Above Pain — WRAP.**
WRAP is especially close to my heart because I want women to have access to something I didn't have back then:
**A safe place to begin understanding what is happening to them without being judged for how they choose to handle it.**
WRAP is not a group where we're going to tell you, **"Just leave."**
You may still be in the relationship.
You may have left.
You may have gone back.
You may be trying to decide what you want.
You may not even be comfortable calling what you're experiencing *domestic violence.*
Maybe you just know...
**Something doesn't feel right anymore.**
Maybe you've spent so much time surviving, caretaking, working, parenting and trying to keep everything together that somewhere along the way...
**you lost pieces of yourself.**
You don't have to have your whole life figured out before you begin healing.
That's what WRAP is about.
**Women Rising Above Pain.**
A therapeutic intensive group for women to begin healing from trauma, rebuilding self-worth, understanding healthy relationships and boundaries, reconnecting with themselves, and finding community with other women who understand.
I am healed in ways that the young woman in that first picture couldn't have imagined.
But I haven't forgotten what surviving felt like.
So, if you ever wonder why I'm so serious about helping Black women heal from depression, low self-esteem, domestic violence and the other traumas we carry...
**Look at the picture.**
She is why.
And if you see a little bit of yourself in her, maybe this group was created with you in mind too. ❤️
**You don't have to leave yourself behind to survive.**
**Women Rising Above Pain (WRAP)**
A Therapeutic Intensive Group for Women
Urban Trauma Counseling Center
If you're interested in WRAP — for yourself or for someone you care about — **send us a private message or contact Urban Trauma Counseling Center to learn more.**
or
Type: "Interested" in the comments
— **Shinelle Oglesby, LCPC**
Founder & Owner
Urban Trauma Counseling Center
