08/21/2026
No matter what side of the current conversations surrounding postpartum mental health you find yourself on, I hope we can agree on one thing: the way we talk about postpartum matters.
This isn't about defending anyone, condemning anyone, or forming opinions about circumstances we don't personally know. It's about the mamas everywhere who are in the earliest stages of their postpartum journey.
They're looking left and right, and everywhere they turn, postpartum mental health is being discussed. It's on social media, in public conversations, around dinner tables, between friends, in churches, at work, and within families. Everyone seems to have an opinion.
Meanwhile, a mama listening may be experiencing baby blues, postpartum depression or anxiety, intrusive thoughts that scare her, or simply the feeling that she isn't quite herself. Some of these conversations aren't making her feel safer to speak. They're making her feel more silenced, scared, and alone.
Regardless of where we stand on the headlines, we don't want a postpartum mother hearing the way we're talking and deciding it's safer to stay quiet.
We also don't want postpartum to become a conversation only about what can go wrong, because motherhood is beyond beautiful, even though it's messy.
There are sleepy cuddles, tiny fingers wrapped around yours, first smiles, middle of the night bonding, laughter, tenderness, pride, overwhelming love, and moments a mama wishes she could freeze forever. Some mothers struggle deeply postpartum. Some genuinely love this season. Many experience both.
None of them are doing motherhood wrong.
We need to hold both truths. Families, partners, friends, churches, employers, and communities need to understand postpartum depression, anxiety, psychosis, intrusive thoughts, birth trauma, and the other challenges that can arise after birth. Mothers need to know they can speak without shame, that they will be taken seriously, and that asking for help doesn't make them a bad mother.
At the same time, awareness shouldn't make motherhood itself sound frightening. A struggling mama shouldn't wonder why everyone else seems happier, and a mama who is thriving shouldn't wonder if she's somehow missing something because her experience is beautiful.
There is room for both stories.
While the world debates the headlines, let's turn some of that attention toward the mothers within our own reach.
Protect her sleep. Make sure she's eating and drinking. Bring food. Wash bottles. Fold laundry. Hold the baby while she showers. Be there for 3am phone calls while she is up alone, feeding or pumping. Sit with her without expecting her to entertain you. Check on her after everyone else has stopped checking. Give her grace if she returns to work. Pay attention to the mama, not only the baby.
As a full-spectrum doula, a huge part of my passion is making sure a mama has a safe person in her corner. Someone who can listen without shame or judgment, celebrate the beautiful moments, sit beside her through the difficult ones, offer practical support, and recognize when additional professional care is needed.
Not every mama is ready or able to explain what she's feeling. When she tells you she's fine, listen to what she may not be saying, too. If words are difficult, ask her, "On a scale of 1 to 5, where are you today?" Let 1 mean, I'm okay and I feel safe, and 5 mean, I'm not okay and I need immediate help. She may not have the words to explain everything, but she may be able to give you a number. Take that number seriously.
Wrap around every mama, so she can heal and love on her baby well.
This is also why I created my postpartum book. I wanted it to be another tool of support, something a mama could turn to quietly in her own home without having to find the right words or explain what she's feeling. Just information, reassurance, nurturing, and a gentle voice reminding her that she matters in this transition, too.
More than anything, I want this book to reach the mamas who may need it. If you know a mama walking through the postpartum season who could use a gentle whisper from a doula, please reach out to me. I would be honored to personally send her a signed copy of my book, completely free of charge. No strings attached. Just one more way to remind a mama that someone sees her, too.
If postpartum mental health is going to be brought into the light, let's use that light to recognize the mothers who are struggling quietly. Let's make asking for help less frightening. Let's educate ourselves about the serious things that can happen during postpartum while also remembering to talk about the love, joy, tenderness, strength, laughter, and beauty that can live there, too.
Postpartum isn't one thing, and neither is motherhood. There is room for every mama's story.
Let's make sure she knows there is room for hers. 🤍
-Doula Jennifer Schaeffer
https://a.co/d/00zWKA0z
