Ms. Shannon’s Counseling Page

09/05/2026

PDA is often misunderstood as simply being oppositional, defiant or refusing to cooperate.

But for children with a PDA profile, everyday demands can create an intense sense of pressure or loss of autonomy — triggering anxiety, avoidance and a powerful need to regain control.

And it isn’t always about avoiding things they dislike. A child may resist activities they genuinely want to do, expectations they have placed on themselves, or something they managed perfectly well yesterday.

Understanding what is driving the behaviour matters, because increasing pressure or consequences can sometimes increase the distress too.

This post explores what PDA is, why demand avoidance can happen, and why recognising what sits underneath the behaviour is so important.

Save this one for later — and share it with someone who may be trying to understand a child whose response to demands feels much bigger than expected.

08/23/2026

08/23/2026

08/06/2026

Students learn when they feel safe enough to take risks, make mistakes, and ask for help.

Safety comes first. Learning follows.

07/30/2026

Felt safety isn't something we tell students. It's something we help them experience.
It's the small, consistent cues we communicate every day, through connection, rhythm, predictability, joyful experiences, and our own regulated presence.

That's The Regulated Classroom® framework.

07/27/2026

In high-demand environments like schools, the tendency is to measure success in large, visible outcomes.

But sustained effectiveness is built on small, invisible ones, the moment you chose curiosity over frustration, the interaction you handled differently than you would have a year ago, the student you reached on a day when reaching felt impossible. Those are worth tracking too.

What's a small professional win from this week?

07/26/2026

The behaviour you punish today could be a child's survival response.

The child who lashes out may be in fight mode. The one who runs away may be in flight. The child who goes quiet and seems to switch off may be frozen. The one who constantly tries to keep everyone happy may be fawning.

These are not choices. They are automatic survival responses that happen when a child feels unsafe, overwhelmed or frightened. Looking beneath the behaviour can completely change how we respond.

When we replace judgement with curiosity, punishment with connection, and ask "What has happened to this child?" instead of "What is wrong with this child?", we give children a much better chance to heal.

Too many children are labelled as naughty, defiant, manipulative or attention-seeking when they are actually doing what their nervous system believes is necessary to survive.

Free CHILDREN’S TRAUMA RESPONSES WHEEL – FIGHT, FLIGHT, FREEZE, FAWN BEHAVIOUR POSTER

LIKE the photo and comment "TRAUMA" and we will send you a message with a link to a free PDF of this resource.

06/27/2026

Please stop using cognitive tools on dysregulated nervous systems. 🙂