10/04/2020
Today would have been my Dads 83 Birthday but instead of getting to celebrate his Birthday, I only get to celebrate the memory of him passing at age 65 long before he was ready to leave. He died of COPD. A disease of the lungs where when he died he essentially drowns on his own fluid in his lungs. This visualization of dying this way had a profound effect on my healing and led me to this new passion, but more on that later.
In 2017 when a PET scan found that my Malignant Melanoma has progressed Stage 4, giving me less then a 12% chance of living because my 12th and 13th tumors had progressed both my left and right lungs I knew I had choice.
I could view it from the standpoint that all of my conventional doctors, friends, and family viewed it as. That it was just s**tty luck/bad genetics to come from a family where my Aunt (my Dad’s only sibling) and 2 out of 5 of her children died of cancer, and both my Dad and his Aunt, died of COPD or lung related issues or....
I could view this as the opportunity to end this generational trauma that keeps repeating itself until someone figures out how to heal it, and I get to be the lucky one to figure this s**t out.
I knew the first option played no part in healing. Everyone I met in the cancer industry chose option one, because that is what we are fed. Cancer is just really bad luck and therefore if your diagnosis it’s bad luck the only way to heal is with good luck, and lots of prayers.
F**k that bulls**t!
There was no way I was going to let my ability to be able to dance with my daughter (who was then 3 years old) when she has her Daddy daughter dance at her wedding, be with some who is not me, while they show pictures of me in the background, be based on luck.
So I choose option two, where I choose to be proactive with my cancer, letting it become my teacher and not my enemy. I choose to let it be my guide in my healing, viewing every tumor as another opportunity to learn from what is was trying to teach me.
That is why I choose the organic plant based way of healing with the Gerson Therapy but still more tumors...
added yoga Sumits Yoga KC but still more tumors ...
added conventional therapy with immunotherapy but still more tumors ...
added daily meditation to help me realize how much what I think becomes my reality, and that I am the one in control of those thoughts, but still more tumors...
added fun back into my life by training Motus Ninjas and then being fortunate enough to compete on American Ninja Warrior, with both tumors still in my lungs...
added trauma based breath work with BioDynamic Breathwork & Trauma Release
and still more tumors ...
went to Coasta Rican rainforest for plant medicine with a shaman and finally no more tumors 💪😀
Which was the one was the one that healed me?
ALL OF THEM!
What does one do now that I have been tumor free for over two years, is my healing finally all done?
NEVER
I have to remain vigilant and seek things that continually keep me from going back from that from which I came. Knowing that my lungs were a vulnerability I chose to study from the person who I believe has the best lungs in the world The Iceman (Wim Hof). I began with the cold showers by only taking cold showers for 6 months which reduces inflammation, increases ones immune and most importantly was a daily reminder that my mind is strong! I combined that with his breathwork which eventually led me to my new new passion ⬇️ conquering the fear that came with my Dad’s passing from not being able to breathe.
Thank you Dad 🙏, for your courage in healing the generational trauma of coming from an abusive father yet loving me unconditionally. That example taught me not only to love my kids with all of my heart, but also showed me that we are not defined by own Fathers journey. You also showed me what it was like to do anything to be able to just have one more day with your kids. It was that lesson that the gave me the strength to do all the things I have to become tumor free. Through your struggles I have found strength 💪! I will continue to do everything in my power to end this generational dis-ease and change the stars for my children like you have done for me.
I will love you always and forever and Happy heavenly Birthday Dad ❤️
