Where to Find Bread

09/01/2026

You won't believe what happened to this guy (for real!). Vincent Van den Broek overcame brain trauma (from an accident on an EScooter). He wants us to know we can survive trauma too with the right mindset.

08/09/2026

It took betrayal to make me realize my marriage isn't more important to God than I am. Thankful for what that experience taught me. And for my partner who also learned from it.

“If you’re a minister, you can almost guarantee that someone in your pews or in your immediate community is experiencing domestic violence,” wrote Russell Moore in 2022.

“Sometimes the victim will have internalized the abusive rhetoric of the abuser and blame themself for bringing on the abuse. Sometimes the one being abused will believe that there is no other option but to stay, feeling trapped in the marriage.

In the case of domestic violence, the church has a responsibility not only to alert the relevant civil authorities but also to bear the abuse sufferer’s burdens by arranging a safe place of refuge and meeting other needs.

The very least that one can expect from one’s church is not to be condemned as a sinner for escaping danger.

Recognize that abusers often weaponize spiritual language to cover the abuse. They might suggest that the abused spouses are ‘unforgiving’ if they leave or that they would be sinning against Jesus if they were to pursue divorce—quoting out-of-context Bible verses all the while. As the steward of the oracles of God, the church has a mandate to call such misuse of the Scriptures what it is: a taking of the Lord’s name in vain, in one of the worst ways imaginable.

Divorce for domestic violence is not a sin. It’s *about* sin all right—but it’s the sin of the abuser, not the sin of the abused who decides to divorce. The abused in our churches and in our communities need to see us applying the Bible the right way, and they need to see us embodying the Jesus Christ who protects the vulnerable.

What God hath joined together, let no man put asunder. Yes and amen. But sometimes Jesus also would have us recognize that man should not force together what God has put asunder.

Sometimes the path to divorce court is not a way to destruction but a road to Jericho. We should look to see who is beaten on the roadside and be for them who Jesus told us to be.”
https://chrst.today/4nFGh84

07/26/2026

UPDATE: It's been a few weeks. First photo is 8/11 after laser, eyeliner, and lip blush. It's pretty subtle but I like it. The rest are day of laser and a few days after. Feeling great. Thanks for your kind comments!

Morning, friends. Quick update.

First, yes, Facebook. My posts have been significantly fewer of late but here's the deal. I kinda got sucked into the social media chipmunk wheel where I felt I had to post to continue to grow. Where growing is the most important rubric of success. I don't like that and doubt you do either. So, I stepped off the wheel.

I know I still owe you a video about our new marriage but to tell the truth (and I know you want that - so do I), we've been busy living it. Things are good here. We're getting so much better at talking our way through triggers and tight spots. And that reinforces our commitment to each other. Guess that's a bit of foreshadowing the content of that video.

I've also begun working on an episode dealing with building our financial literacy after betrayal, both for those of us who will eventually choose to breakup and those who will try to restore their relationships. That's on top of my list of things the betrayed need to do immediately: getting an accurate fix on our finances (to understand our ability to live independently if we go that route). I hope to interview a top NY attorney whose expertise is just that.

Neither of these will come out right away so if you're interested, please follow me so you get the heads up.

In the immediate future, I'm spending most of the next month doing things that make me feel better about myself but don't lend themselves to video making. I got another laser procedure on my face (recovery going nicely, thanks) and early next month I'll have some permanent makeup - covering up my Moh's Surgery scar and restoring symmetry to my lips/ lip tint and eyeliner. Frankly, I am most excited about waking up looking the way I want to look and the eyeliner since I just can't draw a nice line anymore.

Have any of you had any of the above done?

Well, all that is to say you all are still very much on my heart but number 1, I won't let algorithms be the boss of me now. Number 2, if I have something to say I'll say it. Promise. In the meantime, if you have questions, send me a message. Go to the YouTube channel (link in bio) or my website (also see bio).

And finally, I'm not able to wear my glasses yet. Please excuse my typos!

XOXO, Teri

06/12/2026

What are you addicted to? In my search to make peace, wholeness, and joy mainstays in my life, I'm learning about addiction. It's more than just the typical things I think of like drugs, alcohol, and even s*x.

For example, I can't stand for my mind to be unoccupied, to be bored. So, I fill my time with things that reward my desire for the new and novel - things that interest and occupy me. Scrolling, cooking and eating, lots of things, actually.

In order to recognize what's true, I have to be able to recognize the counterfeit.

Here's the key: first, I need to reset my dopamine responses. When I learn to increasingly sit with discomfort I reset my reward pleasure cycle. Over time, Dr. Anna Lembke says, I'll rediscover joy.

I'm getting on that. Watch this and then tell me, what are your resets and how will you get started?

In today’s episode, you’ll learn how to get motivated, even when you don’t feel like it.

06/11/2026

A good explanation of the impacts of partner betrayal trauma on the brain. It's not a small deal, folks.

Did you know that partner betrayal trauma can have a devastating impact? Research shows that approximately 70% of individuals who experience infidelity or si...

06/11/2026

How to tell if your partner is an Intimacy Anorexic. I thought it was me. Maybe it's NOT your fault. For sure, it's not.

When my husband confessed s*xual addiction and the regular use of po*******hy through our entire marriage I was stunned and numb. For 43 years he gaslighted, rejected, and lied to me. But, because I found these resources I found hope. I learned it wasn’t my fault. I began to heal.

06/07/2026

Are you signed up to get my newsletters? If so, check your inbox! This one's about us killing our marriage to get a better one, why my traumatized brain was so confused that I stayed in that marriage for over 40 years, and my YouTube reorg.

Sign up for my newsletter at wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com so I have your email and then let me know you want your copy in the comments!

06/07/2026

Great answers to questions about how we can go for years and not realize what's being done to us...

Have you questioned your own sanity, your instincts, and your memory after discovering your partner’s double life? 💔 If you are the betrayed partner of a se...

06/02/2026

When someone you love has been betrayed, knowing what to say — and what NOT to say — can make all the difference.

In this short video, I share the exact words that actually help someone healing from betrayal trauma. Not the clichés. Not the quick fixes. The things that make someone feel seen, safe, and supported when their world has fallen apart.

These words are for anyone to share with the betrayed, friends, family members, and loved ones who want to show up well — but don't always know how.🕯️

Link to What to Say When Someone You Love is Betrayed in bio and comments below.

05/23/2026

"Words are the architects of our identity."

In this episode, I share how Internal Family Systems helped me understand a protective part of myself and rethink the label victim. This is a conversation about trauma, identity, healing, and choosing words that make room for thriving.

Watch the full episode on YouTube () or wherever you get your podcasts.