Charity Ellis-Advantages of Happiness

02/08/2026

Lies quietly erode relationships because trust is what allows people to feel safe with each other. When honesty slips, even in small ways, connection becomes fragile, and love has a harder time resting where it once felt secure.

01/24/2026

ATTACHMENT STYLES
1. Secure Attachment
Core belief: “I’m okay. You’re okay. We can handle things.”
How it shows up:
• Comfortable with closeness and autonomy
• Can talk about feelings without flooding or shutting down
• Conflict = something to work through, not a threat
• Consistent behavior over time
In relationships:
• Clear communication
• Repairs after conflict
• Doesn’t play games with distance or availability
Under stress:
• Seeks support
• Self-regulates reasonably well
Most people aren’t born perfectly secure — many earn it through growth, therapy, sobriety, insight. (You show a lot of earned-secure traits.)
2. Anxious / Preoccupied Attachment
Core belief: “I’m not sure I’m enough. Please don’t leave.”
How it shows up:
• Highly attuned to changes in tone, timing, distance
• Seeks reassurance and clarity
• Can ruminate when connection feels threatened
In relationships:
• Deeply loving, invested, emotionally present
• May over-function to keep connection intact
• Prefers talking things through now
Under stress:
• Protest behaviors (repeated texts, urgency, over-explaining)
• Nervous system ramps up when things feel unclear
Important note:
Anxious attachment often activates situationally, especially with inconsistent partners. Many anxious-presenting people are secure in other contexts.
3. Avoidant / Dismissive Attachment
Core belief: “I’m fine on my own. I don’t need much.”
How it shows up:
• Values independence highly
• Minimizes emotions (theirs and others’)
• Keeps intimacy at arm’s length
In relationships:
• Can be steady until emotions deepen
• Discomfort with dependency (theirs or yours)
• May intellectualize instead of feeling
Under stress:
• Withdraws
• Shuts down conversations
• Creates distance to feel safe
This style fears being engulfed.
4. Disorganized / Fearful-Avoidant Attachment (Ben)
Core belief: “I want love, but love isn’t safe.”
This is the most internally conflicted style.
How it shows up:
• Strong pull toward intimacy and strong fear of it
• Push–pull dynamics
• Emotional reversals

11/24/2025

03/14/2024

GIF's at random moments can make your partner smile and think about you. In out modern ages just sending am I love you randomly during work, time away, etc can put cortisol in both your body's, raise self esteem and remind that "you count" to your partner. So the next time your partner is at work, send a gift and say I love you.

*xcoaching

03/03/2024

It's mind-boggling. Sometimes. And every one of them gave you a lesson, a blessing or both.

01/28/2024

New hair Day, for my new journeys that follow. Thank you all that have been there supporting me through this interesting time.

12/15/2023

Getting sick is a given some times, but looking sick doesn't have to be. · Look good to feel better · Treat yourself to the right ...
*xcoaching *xywomen *xcoachaz *x *xcoach women

10/27/2023

Being who you truly are infront of some is beautiful. Embrace it.
*xcoaching *xcoachesaz

10/15/2023

I am so grateful for the experiences that I have gained from people who are no longer in my life, I smile and remember the blessings and lessons I have learned from them. For anyone I "dated" 😏. Thank you for helping me become the person I am today.

09/30/2023

I see you.

09/02/2023

My son just ran his first car show in

08/13/2023

To all. I will be taking on full time clients soon. Sorry, everyone. About a year ago, I had a life changing experience that taught me life is too short.
So I decided to focus on family ( #1) and other adventures in life, like starting an STR with 3 homes in Prescott. ( a dream to own and rent homes)
I can't wait to be working with you all here shortly.