06/10/2026
There is a common fear, "I have tried to meditate while waiting for the dinner to cook, but what if things boil over or burn? I find it hard to focus." Remember, mindfulness is a relaxed, focused state of concentration, not about being constantly distracted. Change your what ifs to what is. Begin to doubt your doubts.
Relax. Take a deep breath in. And another. deeper. This activates the parasympathetic nervous system - our natural state of being, as opposed to the sympathetic nervous system, also known as fight-or-flight. When we are stressed out, blood leaves the belly (poor digestion) and the brain (poor thinking) to go into the muscles in order to run away or deal with a challenge. We don't have tigers and bears chasing us anymore, but we do have bills, current politics, and the ubiquitous traffic. Being under low-grade stress can wear out the adrenals, cause poor sleep, and aggravate an assortment of ailments during menopause.
Being able to return to the parasympathetic is crucial, as we think better, sleep better, digest better - indeed, this is when the body and mind can restore, replenish, and rejuvenate itself. Mindfulness is the deliberate act of intentionally entering this state of relaxed concentration. It can be done with the eyes shut or open, while sitting or walking, actually at any time you choose to. Thus, one can be mindful at any time, from brushing your teeth to cooking in the kitchen
Start with a two-minute kitchen meditation. Put the timer on, make sure flames are off or on low. Take a few deep breaths. Use your five senses:
The smells of cooking - differentiate from raw ingredients to final dish
The sounds of cooking: chopping, sizzling, background
The colors of the foods
The taste - what if this was your first time?
The textures on your tongue, palate, between fingers, and the difference between using chopsticks or a fork
Be mindful of your eating space - Use the best china, grate the good Parmesan, light candles, and have fresh flowers. Why not? What have you been saving this for? Make it as delightful as possible.
Take a moment to acknowledge the whole chain of people who made the meal possible - the farmer who planted the produce, the worker who pulled it out of the earth, the trucker who brought it to the store, the market clerk who stocked it, the cashier who sold it, the person who cooked it, the person who served it, the person food or raisewho cleaned up afterwards, the scraps going back into the earth whether by compost or landfill, starting the cycle anew. This is a way to bless the food, all the helpful people who both nourish your body and the earth, as well as deeply appreciate the simple task of creating a meal.
(Excerpt from Laphrodite's Guide to Mindful Menopause or the Adventures of a Baby Crone)
Ramblings on: Mindfulness, holistic healing, hypnotherapy, guided meditations, astrology, reiki, tarot, menopause, Santa Cruz, California, being q***r
