06/12/2026
SOOO GOOD!!!
What I wish someone had told me before I became a mother (from a mental health NP):
I wish someone had told me that becoming a mother would be one of the most beautiful things that ever happened to me and also one of the hardest.
I thought the hard part would be the sleepless nights. Turns out, the hard part was watching my entire identity get shaken up like a snow globe and trying to figure out who I was afterward.
I wish someone had told me that you can love your baby more than you thought was humanly possible and still miss your old life sometimes. That intrusive thoughts can happen to good moms.
That anxiety doesn’t always look like panic. Sometimes it looks like checking if your baby is breathing for the tenth time in an hour.
That crying every day in the beginning doesn’t automatically mean you’re depressed.
That not feeling instantly connected to your baby doesn’t mean you’ve failed some secret motherhood test.
I wish someone had told me that motherhood isn’t just a physical transition. It’s a psychological one. Your body changes. Your relationships change. Your priorities change.
Your brain literally changes.
And somehow you’re expected to act like all of that is normal while keeping a tiny human alive.
As a mental health NP, the biggest thing I wish someone had told me is this:
You do not have to enjoy every moment to be grateful for it. You do not have to love every stage to be a good mom.
You do not have to lose yourself completely to prove how much you love your children. Motherhood is not a test of how much you can sacrifice before you break.
It’s a relationship. One that deserves support, honesty, rest, and a whole lot more grace than most moms ever give themselves.
And if nobody has told you lately: The fact that you worry about being a good mom is usually evidence that you already are one!!
If you are pregnant or postpartum and you just found my page, hi, I’m Kenz!!!!! I am a Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner and mom of two!! After I gave birth to my first daughter I literally couldn’t believe all of the stuff I didn’t know! So I made something for you, something I wish I would have had! It combines all of the newborn stuff you need to know but ALSO is full of the stuff that’s happening to you, too. The identity shift. Knowing the difference between baby blues and something that actually needs attention. It’s all right here, mostly because you matter just as much as the baby! Comment 40 and I will send you the link.
