14/10/2026
Before I decide whether this is good or bad, can I actually encounter it?
I’ve been sitting with this question lately.
Because notice how quickly we assign meaning to our experiences.
Pain: Something is wrong.
Anxiety: I need to calm down.
Confusion: I’ve lost connection with myself.
Fear: I’m not ready.
A symptom flare: I’m going backward.
Even healing work can become another way of deciding that our current experience shouldn’t be happening.
We feel something in our throat and ask, What am I not expressing?
Our stomach flares and we wonder, What am I unable to digest?
We feel confused and immediately start searching for the wound that’s keeping us from clarity.
Those questions aren’t necessarily wrong.
But I’ve been wondering if there’s something that comes before the question.
Before fixing it.
Before understanding it.
Before decoding it.
Before finding the wound underneath it.
Can I actually encounter what is here?
Can I feel the sensation before explaining it?
Can I experience the emotion before turning it into evidence about myself?
Can I meet uncertainty before demanding clarity?
This isn’t about ignoring symptoms or pretending painful experiences are good.
It’s about creating a little space between what is happening and the story I immediately tell myself about what is happening.
Because there may be information available in that space that I can’t hear once I’ve already decided what the experience means.
Meet it before you name it.
Then listen.
This is at the heart of the work I explore in The Intelligence of Pain.
Not simply:
What’s wrong with me?
Or even:
What does this symptom mean?
But perhaps first:
Can I meet what is here with enough openness to discover what it might be showing me?