04/27/2026
Truth bombs 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Before you say “they crossed a boundary”… check who crossed it first.
I had a moment recently where everything in me was lit up. I was frustrated, overwhelmed, convinced the people around me just didn’t get me. It felt like they weren’t listening, weren’t respecting me, weren’t meeting me where I was.
Full transparency: I started rewriting the whole story in my head about who they were and what role they should (or shouldn’t) have in my life.
But when I slowed it down…really looked at it…I saw where it actually began.
Not with them.
With me.
About a day and a half earlier, I had already started abandoning myself in small, quiet ways. Ignoring what my body's signals. Letting my needs slide. Choosing comfort for others over honesty with myself. Not speaking up when I should have. Not honoring limits I know I need to function well.
So by the time I felt “disrespected”… I was already dysregulated. Already disconnected. Already crossing my own boundaries.
Somewhere in that state, I expected the people around me to maybe read my mind, anticipate my needs, and regulate me back into safety.
That’s not support….that’s outsourcing…and it’s not sustainable.
Yes, the people in your life should meet you with care. Yes, they should respect what you communicate.
But they can’t honor boundaries you haven’t even upheld for yourself.
You are your first line of safety. Your first point of regulation. Your first home.
And when you override yourself long enough, the world will start to feel like it’s overriding you too.
So before you decide someone else is the problem…
Ask yourself: Where did I leave myself?
Because sometimes the boundary wasn’t crossed by them – it was quietly abandoned by you.
