12/25/2021
Merry Christmas from Cyclops and Scooter!
A Cyclops Before Christmas
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and Cyclops was miffed,
He’d hunted all day, had a shot but had missed!
Great White Hunter had searched, but it all was in vain,
And Scooter conceded, “I too, feel your pain.”
The big buck had strutted, right down through the woods,
Cyclops vision had blurred, ‘cause he don’t see too good.
But he gritted his tooth, slowly adjusting his cap,
And aimed to give that buck, a final dirt nap -
When up in a tree, there arose such a clatter,
The buck and old one eye, looked to see what was the matter.
Across all the treetops, flew a little gray flash,
That paused once again, to give Cyclops more sass!
The big buck then paused, to watch the new show,
‘Cause the tree rat threw acorns at the Cyclops below;
Then, what to his wondering eye should appear,
But a big momma doe, and her eight Bambi deer,
They all hopped around, so lively and quick,
While one-eye kept shaking, beginning to feel sick.
Then just like an eagle, the squirrel took flight,
While screeching and shouting, on Cyclops’ head he’d alight.
Then dashing and dancing, and prancing his exit,
Like a comet from stupid, he’s a gonner like Brexit;
The squirrel kept his chatter, never letting it fall!
“Danger! dash away! dash away! dash away all!”
As still as a statue, Cyclops stood like a rock,
Still hoping to make, that trophy buck drop.
Finally up gave the squirrel, to his tree top he flew,
And just like a monkey, began throwing his poo!
Still the big buck was standing and acting aloof,
While the big momma doe, began stomping her hoof.
Cyclops still drew a bead, but the buck turned around,
And turned as to leave, took a quick bound:
In grayish-brown fur, from his rack to his foot,
He flipped his white tail, then turned again for a look;
A dozen sharp points stood up from his rack,
With mainbeams as thick, as a factory smoke stack:
Cyclops eye seemed to twinkle, his pulse seemed to quicken,
His knees started shaking, his breath seem stricken;
The drool from his mouth, stretched from his chin to the ground,
And all he could see, was antlers and brown.
Cyclops wedged his tongue between chattering teeth,
And began a slow squeeze, for the buck’s life to cease.
The buck was broadside, only 40 yards out,
And brown filled the scope, as the gun gave a shout.
The buck seem to move, and rather quickly I’d say,
And bent just like Neo, ducking three different ways;
Then a flick of his tail and a tilt of his head
And turned Cyclops’ tummy, he felt nothing but dread.
The buck flicked his tail, with nary a sound,
And took off for safety, with several dozen quick bounds,
As tears began falling aside Cyclops’ bent nose
He cursed and his kicked and then stubbed his big toes.
Scooter rolled to the scene, Cyclops gave a blank stare.
Great White scoured the for a drop, broken twig, or a small patch of hair:
But Cyclops heard the buck jeer, ere he pranced out of sight-
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”
