Dr Carol Shilliday

Dr Carol Shilliday This page is a way to share my views and thoughts as a psychologist. I plan to share what I am learning each week about myself and from my clients.

Barbara Bennett and I are announcing our third IFS and ketamine grief retreat. It will be held at Chozen Eco retreat cen...
09/03/2026

Barbara Bennett and I are announcing our third IFS and ketamine grief retreat. It will be held at Chozen Eco retreat center in Sebastian Florida in February 2027. Please contact me with any interest or questions. This is a powerful retreat where we come together in community to hold and support each other in our grief journeys.

If you missed the Goodreads giveaway, there is another opportunity to win a copy of my book “Inside ADHD: An Internal Fa...
08/26/2026

If you missed the Goodreads giveaway, there is another opportunity to win a copy of my book “Inside ADHD: An Internal Family Systems Workbook.” New Harbinger Publications is hosting a giveaway through August 31. Use this link to enter https://gleam.io/FjbKF/inside-adhd-giveaway-bundle New Harbinger Publications

I know many of you were waiting for the Audible version of my book “Inside ADHD” - as of August 18th it is now available...
08/24/2026

I know many of you were waiting for the Audible version of my book “Inside ADHD” - as of August 18th it is now available! New Harbinger Publications

I know many of you have been waiting for the audible version of my book to come out. As of August 18 it is available! An...
08/24/2026

I know many of you have been waiting for the audible version of my book to come out. As of August 18 it is available! And those of you in Europe are still waiting for the book to come out on September 24, but I do believe you can get the audible version now.
New Harbinger Publications

More exploring of Ireland - Galway Bay
08/23/2026

More exploring of Ireland - Galway Bay

There was a show that aired in the UK that claimed ADHD is a myth. This on going debate and misconception around the leg...
08/20/2026

There was a show that aired in the UK that claimed ADHD is a myth. This on going debate and misconception around the legitimacy of ADHD is so harmful. There has been quite the reaction to it and I felt this woman’s was worth reading

As you know, I watched Channel 4's The Great ADHD Myth? last night, and I found it shocking. So I wanted to do a more thorough post.

As an AuDHD counsellor who works solely with Autistic and ADHD clients, and as someone with lived experience myself and with grown up children with ADHD, I felt incredibly angry and disappointed by what I watched.

But I have tried to write a measured post.

The neurodivergent community has spent years fighting to be heard, believed and understood, and I felt this programme undermined so much of that work.

There are conversations that we absolutely should be having about ADHD.

Schools are often simply not set up to meet the needs of ADHD pupils.

Medication isn't right for everybody. People deserve informed choices, proper monitoring and the opportunity to consider what works for them as an individual. And yes, I think there are times when we need to pause and reflect rather than automatically seeing medication as the only answer.

But none of those things mean that ADHD doesn't exist.

That was one of my biggest problems with this documentary.

Valid concerns about our education system, diagnosis and medication seemed to be presented in a context of questioning ADHD itself.

Those are two completely different conversations.

One part that particularly stood out to me was the presenter's own ADHD assessment.

He acknowledged experiencing the traits being discussed but explained that he had found ways of dealing with them.

For me, that demonstrated something that so many neurodivergent people will recognise.

We learn strategies. We compensate. We mask. We find ways to cope.

Being able to manage a difficulty doesn't mean that difficulty isn't there.

Yet I felt this part of the programme reinforced one of the very messages neurodivergent people have been hearing for years:

"You can't be neurodivergent. You look like you're coping fine."

But what does "coping fine" actually look like from the inside?

How much energy does it take?

How many systems have you had to create to keep functioning?

How exhausted are you when nobody is watching?

Finding ways to function in a world that wasn't designed for your brain isn't proof that your neurodivergence doesn't exist.

We also followed a young boy, Mason, as he came off his ADHD medication, alongside changes being made to other aspects of his life.

But what particularly struck me was what we learned almost as a side note towards the end of the programme: Mason had gone back onto his medication because he was struggling at school without it.

For me, that deserved much more attention.

I also question how much shame Mason was experiencing around taking medication, due to the conversation around him, and whether this was a big factor to him stating he wanted to be off them rather than questioning the effect of the medication themselves. The question put up to him were very misleading.

What was he struggling with? What difference did restarting medication make for him? And was his struggle really only educational, or was there more happening for him that we weren't shown?

After spending so much of the programme questioning ADHD medication, surely the fact that this child ultimately restarted his medication warranted proper exploration rather than feeling like a footnote.

I also found some of the tone deeply uncomfortable. At times, rather than genuinely exploring ADHD people's experiences, I felt those experiences were being trivialised and even mocked.

That matters.

People with ADHD have spent lifetimes being told they are lazy, naughty, difficult, careless, too much, not trying hard enough or simply lacking discipline.

Many finally receive a diagnosis and begin to understand why certain things have always been so difficult.

We absolutely can — and should — question how ADHD is diagnosed.

We can question prescribing practices.

We can talk about whether schools are failing neurodivergent children.

We can acknowledge that medication can be life-changing for one person and completely wrong for another.

We can demand better research, better assessments and better support.

But we can have every single one of those conversations without questioning whether ADHD itself exists.

I could probably write considerably more about this programme, but ultimately I think the most useful thing we can do now is what the neurodivergent community has been doing for years.

Carry on.

Carry on talking.
Carry on challenging misinformation.
Carry on sharing lived experiences.
Carry on educating professionals, schools, families and society.

And above all, carry on listening to ADHD people.

Because after a programme like this, those voices need to be heard more than ever. ❤️



Picture description: A close-up selfie of a woman sitting indoors on a sofa. She has dark hair, glasses resting on top of her head, and is wearing silver drop earrings, a necklace and a navy-blue top with a small white floral pattern. She is looking directly at the camera with a neutral expression. A light-coloured wall and dark wall art can be seen in the background.

Goodreads is hosting a free giveaway of kindle copies of my book. Today is the last day! I am providing the link so you ...
08/18/2026

Goodreads is hosting a free giveaway of kindle copies of my book. Today is the last day! I am providing the link so you can go ahead and enter and maybe be one of 20 people that win. New Harbinger Publications

Inside ADHD: An Internal Family Systems Workbook to Understand Your Parts and Emotionally Thrive by Carol Shilliday PsyD

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A beautiful day in West Cork!!!
08/17/2026

A beautiful day in West Cork!!!

The book launch was wonderful! A big thanks to all who came out!
08/03/2026

The book launch was wonderful! A big thanks to all who came out!

NYC!!!
08/02/2026

NYC!!!

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