Thirusha Mohabir Clinical Psychologist

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Thirusha Mohabir Clinical Psychologist I am a Clinical Psychologist working in private practice at the Beacon Rock Medical Centre in Umhlanga Rocks, Durban.

Founder/Author of The Mental Health Compass I am a dedicated professional committed to providing a variety of quality mental health care services, in English, to clients 4 years of age and older. I have a special interest in Child and Adolescent psychopathology, however I do see adults too. In a safe and contained environment, my client, in collaboration with me, can explore their inner conflicts, relationships, past traumas & present challenges. I do not apply a specific therapeutic stance when seeing clients; instead I prefer to tailor my therapeutic interventions according to the unique characteristics of each of my clients & their presenting issues. My goal is to enhance my clients’ understanding of themselves, their relationships & their external surroundings, so that they may grow & attain a sense of personal well-being, & achieve more satisfying relationships with others. Some of the concerns I see patients for include, but are not limited to, the following:
Depression, Bipolar Mood Disorder, Separation anxiety, PTSD, Attempted suicide/Suicidal thoughts, Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), Disruptive behaviour disorders, Eating disorders, Enuresis/Bedwetting, Emotional difficulties, Intellectual disability (ID), Autism, Schizophrenia, Complicated Grief, Personality disorders, abuse, Bodily complaints (without a medical cause), Problems associated with major life changes, including transitions and illness. Consultation Fees: Standard medical aid rates apply and reduced rates are offered to clients who wish to settle payment via cash, debit card, or credit card. I know that sometimes taking the first step, and asking for help, can be an extremely difficult thing to do, but I am here to accompany you on your unique journey towards better mental wellness. Please feel free to contact me or check out my website for further details about what services I offer.

18/10/2026

🧡 KNOW YOUR ELDERS BETTER | When You Love Your Parent, But Your Childhood Still Hurts

Sometimes, the most complicated relationships we have are with the very people who raised us.

As children, we may have experienced criticism, emotional distance, unrealistic expectations or moments when we simply didn't feel understood.

And those experiences can stay with us long after we've grown up.

But adulthood often brings a different perspective.

We begin to understand the financial pressures, responsibilities, emotional struggles and difficult circumstances our parents may have been navigating.

We realise that some parents were doing the best they knew how, even when their best unintentionally caused hurt.

And that's where the emotional conflict begins.

đź’” The child within us remembers how it felt.

❤️ The adult within us understands why it may have happened.

Both experiences can be true.

As our parents grow older, this unresolved conflict can sometimes create emotional distance. We may love them deeply, yet struggle to spend time with them because familiar interactions reopen old wounds.

And while we try to make sense of yesterday, time continues to pass.

Healing doesn't mean pretending our childhood didn't hurt. Nor does understanding our parents mean excusing harmful behaviour.

It means recognising that we cannot change what happened, but we can begin to make more conscious decisions about how we want to relate to our parents today.

For some, that may mean rebuilding connection. For others, it may mean establishing healthier boundaries or accepting that a different kind of relationship is necessary.

🧡 You can honour your childhood pain while deciding what relationship is possible today.

The Mental Health Compass
Psychology in Everyday Life

13/10/2026

❤️ KNOW YOUR PARTNER BETTER

“Why does my partner keep treating me like this?”

It's a question many people ask when they find themselves repeatedly hurt by someone they love.

The hurt.
The apology.
The promise to change.
The forgiveness.
The hope that this time things will be different.

And then the same behaviour happens again.

At some point, we may need to ask ourselves a different question:

“Why do I keep accepting what continues to hurt me?”

This isn't about blaming yourself for someone else's behaviour. It's about understanding the emotional patterns that may be keeping you in a painful cycle.

Sometimes it's the fear of being alone. Sometimes it's the hope that your partner will eventually change. Sometimes it's the emotional investment you've already made, or the belief that if you just love them enough, things will get better.

But here's something important to remember:

❤️ Understanding someone's struggles does not mean you have to keep accepting the hurt they cause.

You can love someone.
You can understand their past.
You can recognise their emotional wounds.

But you cannot take responsibility for changing behaviour that they are unwilling to address themselves.

Genuine change requires accountability, consistent effort and actions that match promises.

Recognising these patterns can be difficult, and changing your circumstances may not always be simple or safe. But becoming aware of what keeps you in the cycle is an important step towards protecting your emotional wellbeing.

❤️ You cannot do someone else's healing for them.

đź’¬ Are you holding on to the person your partner consistently shows you they are, or the person you keep hoping they will become?

05/10/2026

“A child’s first bully can be an unhealed parent.”

That can be an uncomfortable sentence to read.

And no, it doesn’t mean that every parent with unresolved childhood wounds will hurt their child.

It also doesn’t mean that losing your patience, getting angry or getting parenting wrong sometimes makes you a bully.

It’s about what can happen when the things we experienced as children remain unexamined and unresolved.

Maybe you were told:

“Stop crying.”
“You’re too sensitive.”
“Why can’t you just listen?”
“Why can’t you do anything right?”

Maybe you were shamed, criticised or frightened into behaving.

And because that was called discipline, you grew up believing that was simply how children were raised.

Then you become a parent.

Your child cries.
They don’t listen the first time.
They have a tantrum.
They make mistakes.

And suddenly you hear yourself saying the very things that once hurt you.

Not because you don’t love your child.

But because sometimes what we don’t heal, we mistake for normal.

Our children can trigger wounds they did not create; and healing those wounds is not their responsibility.

The cycle begins to change when we can recognise:

“This reaction belongs to something in me. My child doesn’t have to carry it.”

You don't need to have had a perfect childhood to be a good parent.

But sometimes one of the greatest things you can do for your child is to get help for the parts of your own childhood that are still hurting.

💛 Healing as a parent isn’t about becoming perfect. It’s about doing the inner work so your child doesn’t have to heal from the same things you did.

The Mental Health Compass
Psychology in Everyday Life

28/09/2026

đź’ś When did everything become so serious?

As adults, we become very good at carrying responsibility.

》We work.
》We plan.
》We organise.
》We care for people.
》We solve problems.

And when one thing gets crossed off the list, something else usually takes its place.

Eventually, even our free time can become another opportunity to achieve something.

â—Ź Exercise must improve our bodies.
â—Ź Hobbies must make us better at something.
â—Ź Rest must help us become more productive.
â—Ź Even fun can start needing a purpose.

But human beings need experiences that exist simply because they bring us pleasure, curiosity, connection and joy.

Playfulness does not mean abandoning responsibility.

It means remembering that responsibility doesn't have to consume your entire identity.

â—Ź So dance to the song.
â—Ź Paint the terrible picture.
â—Ź Laugh until you snort.
â—Ź Run through the rain.

Do something you're not particularly good at, and resist the urge to turn it into another goal.

đź’ś You can take your responsibilities seriously without taking every moment of your life seriously.

Growing older doesn’t mean growing out of joy.

What did you love doing before everything needed a reason?

26/09/2026

When we really like someone, it’s easy to become preoccupied with whether they like us.

• We analyse the texts.
• We rethink what we said.
• We wonder whether we were too much, too quiet, too honest, too needy… or simply not enough.

And somewhere in all of that, we can forget something important:

They aren’t the only person making a choice.

Instead of only asking, “Do they like me?”, pay attention to what it actually feels like to be with them.

• How do they treat people when there’s nothing to gain?
• What happens when you disagree?
• Do they listen when you’re hurt?
• Do they respect your boundaries?
• Is there room for your friendships, goals and interests?
• Can you be honest, imperfect and fully yourself?

Chemistry matters. Attraction matters.

But so does who you become in the relationship.

Because being wanted isn’t the same as being well loved.

❤️ Don’t become so focused on being chosen that you forget you’re choosing too.

— Thirusha Mohabir
Clinical Psychologist
The Mental Health Compass

19/09/2026

“I don’t know where this attitude has come from!”

It’s something many parents say about their teenagers.

And sometimes, teenagers are testing boundaries, becoming more independent, pushing back and figuring out who they are.

But there’s another part of the conversation that can be uncomfortable:

Sometimes they are also reflecting behaviours they have watched.

If we become rude when we're inconvenienced, expect exceptions when rules don't suit us, dismiss people when we're busy, or speak impatiently when we're frustrated, our children notice, even when we think they aren't paying attention.

Then, when that same tone eventually comes back at us, it can be much easier to recognise it in them than in ourselves.

This isn't about blaming parents or expecting perfection.

It's about remembering that modelling is also teaching.

Sometimes helping our teens change begins with being willing to notice what we're showing them. ❤️

The Mental Health Compass
Helping people feel seen, heard & understood.

Address

21 Lighthouse Road Umhlanga Rocks
Durban
4319

Opening Hours

Tuesday 08:00 - 16:30
Wednesday 08:00 - 16:30
Thursday 08:00 - 16:30
Friday 08:00 - 16:30
Saturday 08:00 - 13:00

Telephone

+27315758343

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