09/03/2026
I Finally Understand What “Use Me” Means. ❤️
Meditation is so vital to my day. When I miss a day, I can feel it. My whole day feels off, and it’s like nothing seems to go right.
But this morning, during my meditation, God reminded me of something I had been praying about for years: “Use me in whatever capacity You need me.”
For years, I carried so many titles for everybody else, but never really understood what it meant to be me. I was just walking around doing… but this morning, God showed me exactly how He has been using me.
This season isn’t just about me grieving.
It’s about telling my story.
The story of how I loved. How I lost. How I grieved. And how, somewhere in the middle of all of this, I found myself again.
That’s why I share what I share. The openness. The vulnerability. The joy. The hard days. The beautiful days. All of it.
About two years ago, God told me to write the vision. And I have to admit, I thought I knew what that vision was. I was writing the vision I thought I wanted.
No… He meant write my story.
This story.
Three months ago, I started writing about losing my best friend suddenly. And as the days went on, it became bigger than that one moment. It started becoming a memoir… my life.
But then it got heavy.
Writing those pages meant reliving that day all over again, and I stopped.
Yesterday, I felt that nudge from the Holy Spirit telling me to pick it back up.
So I am.
Not because I want sympathy. Not because I’m looking for empathy.
Because I was instructed to.
And I have to be obedient.
I don’t know where this book will take me, but I pray that when it is released, my story finds the people who need it. I pray that someone who has experienced a painful loss reads my words and realizes they aren’t alone.
Maybe this was never just about me surviving grief.
Maybe it was always about God using my story to help someone else survive theirs. ❤️
