06/09/2026
Toxic / sh*tty relationships in your 30s can equal:
revenge body,
new hair style,
getting back to the gym,
meeting your friends LOTS, dressing up,
having fun,
having more fun,
Insta pics showing HOW WELL you are doing.
All that changes when you’re 40+…
You have no interest in revenge. You definitely don’t invite chaos into your life
Because you’ve been there, done that and have the tear-stained t-shirt - and on reflection, you can now see how incredibly unhealthy that relationship was.
You crave peace,
freedom,
sitting alone,
appreciating the calm that surrounds you – knowing that it won’t (and can’t) be disrupted.
You enjoy slow mornings …the ones where you don’t need to have a plan. The ones where you can choose what you want to do, without the pressure of someone else trying to dictate your day.
You enjoy time alone …because there’s no one there, insisting they are with you constantly – cancelling their own plans so they can be with you (even though you didn’t ask them to and certainly don’t want them to), they turn up unannounced because they “missed you” – then stay …even all you wanted to do was enjoy your day off alone.
You eat what you want ...because you can. Because there’s no one there to comment on what you’re eating, or how much you’re eating, or how little you’re eating.
You wear what you want …and don’t receive an interrogation – “Why are you wearing that? You must be trying to get someone’s attention”
You talk to who you want …because you can be friends with other people – even those of the opposite s*x!! – without it inciting manipulation
“Why are you talking to them – you’re not single”
“Why do you need to spend time with other people, you’re supposed to love me”
“WHY do you want to go out alone, we’re supposed to be a team”
You’re just YOU. And you finally realise that’s the best feeling there is.
PS…
If you’re reading this having left a toxic relationship and wishing you felt the same way – you can and will get there. Because you made the choice to leave and now you have many more choices you can keep making to rebuild your own life.
If you’re new here, I’m Aimee Heaton, founder of From Past To Purpose® I took my own personal experience of being in an abusive relationship and later being diagnosed with trauma – at which point my mission became not to have any woman feel the way I did at that time.
Since then, I’ve turned my past horrible experience into my purpose – I’m now an award-winning Trauma-Informed Personal Transformation Coach & Astrology Guide.
My coaching meets women where they are, but I refuse to leave them there. Healing is about rebuilding your confidence, reclaiming your voice, and learning that peace can be powerful.
I’d love to connect with you! Feel free to contact me with any questions or to chat 🩷