10/09/2026
I don’t often post about me… but today I want to let you see a little piece of the person behind Find Your Balance. 🤍
Sometimes people ask me:
“Why should I have Reiki?”
“What will a sound bath do?”
“What will I feel?”
“How does it actually work?”
And honestly… I can’t always answer those questions.
Because I don’t know exactly what you need.
I don’t know what you’ve been carrying.
I don’t know what you’ve buried.
I don’t know what your body, mind or energy is holding onto.
But I do know what energy work has done for me.
And that is why I believe in it so deeply.
My journey into energy work began after I lost my amazing younger brother who brought light into any room he entered.
My whole world was turned upside down.
I remember feeling like I was a body with no soul. Just going through the motions. Getting up. Getting dressed when I needed. Looking after the children. Smiling when I needed to smile.
Because I had to be strong.
I had a family who needed me.
I had young children who still needed their mum.
We had a funeral to plan.
But underneath that strength, I was falling apart.
I had already experienced antidepressants and psychology after losing a baby many years before, and I knew they weren’t the path I wanted to take.
It hadn’t worked for me.
In fact, I felt like the hate for the world became stronger and the walls around me became higher.
That isn’t me saying medication is wrong. It isn’t. For some people, it is life-changing and absolutely necessary.
But for me, I knew I needed to understand what was happening beneath the surface, I didn’t want to mask the problem and spend my life taking medication and muddle through.
So I turned towards holistic healing - no one around me got it, they actually thought I was a bit loopy however after losing so one so close and crumbling before them But after losing someone so close to me and watching me crumble, they went with it.
They didn’t understand it.
It wasn’t their beliefs.
But they didn’t question it.
And that was enough.
But slowly… something started to shift.
Not overnight.
Not magically.
Not in a straight line.
Slowly.
Reiki.
Meditation.
Sound.
Energy work.
Time spent actually sitting with myself instead of constantly trying to outrun how I felt.
And then something happened that I hadn’t expected.
The healing got deeper.
And sometimes… darker.
Because I started uncovering things I thought I had dealt with years ago.
Trauma from childhood.
School bullying.
Abusive relationships.
Loss.
Miscarriages.
Losing my best friend, my gorgeous rottie who was beside me through everything no matter what.
Fear.
Guilt.
Anger.
Grief.
Things I had convinced myself I had “moved on” from.
But I hadn’t.
I had just buried them.
I had spent years building walls around myself because those walls were keeping me safe.
I didn’t trust people.
I hated the world.
I expected bad things to happen.
I saw the darkness before I saw the good.
I struggled to step outside my comfort zone. Meeting new people terrified me. Speaking in groups terrified me. Doing things alone terrified me.
And I thought that was just who I was.
But energy work started showing me that maybe it wasn’t who I was.
It was who I had become to survive.
And that realisation changed everything.
Reiki, sound baths and meditation haven’t magically erased my pain.
They haven’t taken away my grief.
They haven’t made life perfect.
What they have given me is a space to slow down enough to actually listen to myself.
To feel.
To release.
To understand.
To face things I had spent years avoiding.
And honestly?
It has been bloody hard.
There have been days I’ve wanted to walk away.
Days when feeling everything felt worse than feeling nothing.
But I kept going.
And little by little, I started finding me underneath all of it.
The anger softened.
The fear became quieter.
The walls started coming down.
My mind learned how to switch off.
I learned how to breathe again.
I learned to appreciate the tiny things.
I learned that vulnerability isn’t weakness.
And perhaps most importantly…
I learned that I don’t have to protect myself so fiercely that nobody can get close enough to love me.
I can stand in front of a room full of people and speak.
I can walk into a group where I know absolutely nobody and feel comfortable.
I can meet people.
I can try new things.
I can actually enjoy life.
And I can face things that the old version of me would never have believed she could.
Because there is something else I’ve realised through all of this…
Energy work has changed the way I respond to life itself.
Earlier this year, I was told that I have three brain tumours.
And I honestly think the person I was years ago would have completely spiralled.
I would have gone straight to the worst possible outcome.
Fear would have taken over.
I would have searched for every possible negative scenario and built walls around myself all over again.
But that isn’t where I am now.
Of course I’ve been scared.
Of course there have been difficult days.
I’m human.
But alongside that fear, there has been an acceptance that I don’t think I would have had before.
I’ve been able to take a breath.
To take things one step at a time.
To trust that I will get through whatever comes next.
To remind myself that I am going to be okay.
And perhaps most importantly, to believe that I am exactly where I’m supposed to be right now.
Not because I think everything happens for a reason.
Not because I believe I’m somehow immune to difficult things.
But because I’ve learnt that I don’t have to know exactly how everything is going to unfold in order to be okay in this moment.
That, for me, is a huge part of healing.
Being able to sit with uncertainty without allowing it to completely consume me.
Being able to feel fear without becoming fear.
Being able to find gratitude even when life feels incredibly hard.
And yes, I still carry pain.
I still miss my brother more than words could ever explain.
There are days when grief hits me like a wave and I would give anything to have him physically here.
But I’m able to move through those moments differently now.
I can feel the grief without letting it consume me.
I can come back to gratitude.
I can hold the love alongside the loss.
And I believe that is what healing has really been for me.
Not becoming someone who has never been hurt.
Becoming someone who knows how to hold the hurt.
That is why the spiritual side of what I do means so much to me too.
I believe we are more than just our physical bodies.
I believe there are things we feel that we can’t always explain logically.
I believe intuition matters.
I believe energy matters.
And while I will never tell you that Reiki or a sound bath is going to “fix” you, I will tell you that I have personally experienced what can happen when you finally give yourself permission to stop, breathe and turn inward.
Sometimes the biggest changes don’t happen because someone gives us an answer.
They happen because, for the first time, we become quiet enough to hear our own.
So if you’re reading this and you’re feeling stuck…
If you’re carrying something you haven’t been able to put down…
If you’ve tried things that haven’t worked…
Please don’t give up on yourself.
You don’t have to have everything figured out.
You don’t have to be positive all the time.
You don’t have to pretend you’re okay.
And you don’t have to wait until life breaks you open before you start looking at what’s underneath.
You can start now.
Gently.
One breath.
One conversation.
One moment of stillness.
One step at a time.
At your own pace.
Because there is so much more to you than the things you’ve survived.
And maybe the person you’re desperately trying to find…
has been there underneath it all along. 🤍
This is why I do what I do.
Not because I have all the answers.
But because I know what it feels like to need somewhere safe to begin.
Find Your Balance 🤍
Rest • Release • Receive