06/14/2026
Diabetes & Perfectionism Are The Real Reason I've Been Quiet
I am venting to you from my bathtub in Baltimore, Maryland, with a desire to finally be naked and unafraid to share what's been going on in my twenty-something-year-old Diabaddie life.
"Why do I struggle to stay consistent with the Diabaddie community I built?"
It's a question I've been asked since 2021, just two years after founding the organization. Since then, I've connected with diabetic baddies around the world through social media, events, and our programs. But when it comes to showing up consistently for my girls, I've often found myself doing it in short bursts.
The answer to this always brings me back to the same place: the relationship between "perfectionism" and "diabetes burnout".
The Truth
I Had A Panic Attack ...
On March 31, 2026, I started therapy for the first time in nearly two years after having a mental breakdown during a low blood sugar scare in the shower. But the breakdown wasn't because I was afraid of going low. It was because I was disappointed in myself for not estimating my carbs well enough at dinner, in order to to take a shower without interruption.
By talking through this in my counseling sessions, I learned that living with a chronic illness has taught me to equate "control" with "safety" and leave very little room for grace.
I Feel Like The "Range" Has Been Holding Me Hostage ...
Managing Type 1 diabetes since age six trained me to plan my life around a target glucose range of 80–160 mg/dL and do everything possible to stay as close to perfectly within that range for as long as possible.
If your sugar goes too LOW, below 80, you could pass out.
If your sugar goes too HIGH, above 160, you're at risk of getting sick, or even worst diabetic keto acidosis.
In diabetes management, the stakes are high enough that perfection can feel necessary. Sometimes, it can feel like life or death. But somewhere along the way, I realized I had started applying those same standards to the rest of my life.
If the outcome wasn't perfect, I kept it hidden. I "deaded" projects, ideas, and opportunities as if they had never existed. But if the results met my expectations, I gave them life and shared them confidently with others.
I believe part of this mindset comes from growing up with diabetes before modern technology.
In 2010, if I didn't have good numbers, I could simply avoid logging them or erase them from my meter before an endocrinology appointment. Today, insulin pumps and continuous glucose monitors create a real-time record of my diabetes management.
And while I'm grateful for the doctors and technology that help keep me alive, there are moments when having diabetes can feel a little like being on house arrest.
Fast forward to 2026, and technology gives my care team access to almost every mistake I make and view every moment I'm not perfectly in range. So now, not only do I have devices connected to my body reminding me to stay on track, but I also carry the subconscious belief that someone is always watching to make sure I get it right.
Recognizing that made me wonder how many other Diabaddies are carrying the same burden.
"How many of us are living with diabetes burnout while quietly trying to be perfect in every other area of life, too?
🎥 See It In Real Life
🧠 The OGDiabaddie Brain Dump
Why This Matters...
The real reason I've been quiet is that I spent years believing I needed to have everything under control before I showed up.
Key Takeaways
- Living with Type 1 diabetes requires patience, not perfection.
- Perfectionism and burnout are more common than many of us realize.
- We can only control what we can control and trust God with the rest.
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